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My Aura Has Never Been Nerdier😊💗

@azure-firecracker / azure-firecracker.tumblr.com

Phoebe. 19. She/her. Very gay. Occasional writer, over analyzer, always a fan of female cartoon villains. Welcome to my blog where I obsess over cartoons, murder mysteries, 90s/2000s sci-fi/fantasy, Taylor Swift, and many other things:)
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Happy Belated Birthday to Me!

When I asked y’all what I should do for my birthday, the top two results were a rant about my favorite MSR moments and a self-indulgent oneshot. I combined the two, and now present: a collection of some of my beloved MSR moments - in fic form!

(Specifically, this is a series of vignettes reflecting Mulder slowly falling in love with Scully over the course of some of my favorite MSR scenes).

Fic Title: I Hate All of My Habits, But I Happen to Love You

Rating: General Audiences

Word Count: 5,066

Description: Mulder's thoughts in pivotal moments, as he slowly realizes what Scully means to him.

Or: A series of vignettes depicting Mulder's inner monologue throughout some of my favorite MSR moments.

Enjoy! Thanks to everyone who sent me birthday wishes. Love y’all❤️

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headcanon/fic idea where during the cancer arc, mulder is over at scully's place on a saturday morning going over a case file (that probably could have waited until monday, but he wanted to check on her, and scully knows that, and mulder knows that scully knows, but they both just keep it to themselves). and at one point, scully checks the time and sighs and says she needs to call and cancel her nail appointment for that afternoon, and when mulder asks her why, she says it's bc her dr prescribed her a new med and it's giving her slight double vision, and "it's a common side effect and it's temporary, but i don't want to drive until i adjust to it, and it's not worth it to pay for a cab just for a manicure"

and mulder is like, "i'm not doing anything today, i'll take you"

and obviously scully dismisses the offer, but he keeps insisting, and the truth of it is, with all the constant med adjustments and (occasionally gross) physical side effects of medication and just being sick in general, she hasn't felt particularly attractive in weeks, and while it's not like she is trying to impress anybody, she takes a lot of pride in her appearance and how she presents herself to the world, and her nails are so brittle and the polish has completely chipped away from her last manicure, and honestly, this one little thing, no matter how inconsequential, really would go a long way to making her feel more like herself

so she eventually relents (which pleasantly surprises mulder bc she is stubborn af)

on the way there she's already apologizing for how boring he'll probably find it -- how frivolous and feminine -- and "it shouldn't take too long, i'll tell her to skip the hand massage," and mulder is like, "if you tell her not to give you a hand massage i will hold you at gunpoint until you let her do it" bc he is NOT about to let her skip out on some self-care bc she's worried he'll be judging her for indulging in something "girly"

(he knows she constantly walks a fine line between expressing her femininity and keeping it to herself bc she's worried it will make her male peers view her less seriously)

her nail tech immediately asks if mulder is her husband, even tho she knows damn well he's not bc she asks him if she's found a man yet at every gd appointment, and when she says no, the nail tech is like, "why not? he's handsome and he took you to your appointment, he seems like good husband material"

(they side step out of the conversation, but she is painfully aware of mulder's smirk)

her nail tech asks mulder if he wants a manicure too, and scully thinks she's probably joking, but mulder is like "hell yeah," and scully feels like how she does when he talks about aliens with random cops and witnesses with a straight face -- like, a little embarrassed, but also in awe of his complete lack of giving a fuck

so they are seated side-by-side and get manicures at the same time

mulder doesn't get any polish, but he lets his nail tech shape his nails and apply cuticle oil and, yes, give him a hand massage

he and scully have a brief debate about her nail polish, bc she always gets a super light pink or just a glossy finish (bc anything bolder would feel like overindulging in her femininity and she doesn't want to give any of her misogynistic peers more ammo), but mulder is mercilessly persistent, saying shit like, "that peach color would look good on you" (it wouldn't, she thinks, she's too pale for it) or "that burgundy one would match the new dark lipstick you got a while ago," and she's sat there wondering when the fuck he noticed something as trivial as the shade of her lipstick, and does that mean he's paid attention to other aspects of her appearance? and if so, what does he think of them?

(eventually she lets him talk her into an insanely light shade of baby blue, mostly bc he said it would complement her eyes and she was too caught off guard to tell him to stuff it, and the nail tech makes another casual quip about how good of a husband he would be, and a teeny tiny voice in the back of her head that she can barely hear is saying, "yeah, actually, he would")

when they're finished, he slips the nail tech his credit card while she is searching for her wallet in her overcoat pocket, and he does not look remotely remorseful when she reprimands him, that bastard

in the car, she can't help laughing at the way he keeps checking out his nails, tilting them so the sunlight hits them through the window and he can see how uniform and shiny they are (his nail tech talked him into a clear top coat)

he offers to drive to the chinese restaurant a few blocks from the lincoln memorial, bc she mentioned to him two weeks ago that whenever she is too nauseous to want food, she can for some reason always stomach that restaurant's egg drop soup, and even tho she's not nauseous rn and has also eaten enough egg drop soup lately that it actually sounds a little abhorrent, she says yes anyway, bc she's so touched that he remembered that small detail

they end up getting an order to go (she orders a full entree of vegetable shrimp along with her soup, and the look of relief and delight on mulder's face when he realizes she has an appetite for once makes her blush)

they go back to her place and watch The Thing, and then a rerun of jeopardy (they're pretty evenly matched in terms of useless trivia knowledge, but the final jeopardy question is "this man is the only doctor in history to have a 300% mortality rate," and scully was saying "dr. liston !" before mulder had a chance to process how that was even possible)

she gets drowsy early (another side effect these days), and mulder is discreet in not pointing it out, and instead makes an excuse about needing to feed his fish so he should probably get going, and once again, they both know what he's doing, but they both keep it to themselves

she walks him to the door, and before he leaves, he takes her hand. she lets him raise it up beside her face, even tho she's not sure what he's doing, until he says, "yep, i was right, these make your eyes even prettier," and like ??? what is she supposed to do with THAT??

in the end she does nothing except let him kiss the tips of her fingers, right on the light blue polish, and then lets him kiss her on the forehead. (she tries not to think about where else she'd like him to kiss her, and fails miserably)

they part with shy goodbyes, and it's only in retrospect that she realizes she hadn't actually thanked him, not really

when she is dressed and ready for bed, she slides under the sheets and calls his cell

"mulder, it's me," and somehow he sounds delighted to hear from her, as if they hadn't just spent the entire day together

"i just wanted to thank you for today. i really needed it"

she isn't able to express her gratitude in full, bc that would require being emotionally vulnerable and she's not v good at that, but she suspects mulder hears what she isn't saying anyway

"anytime, scully," he says, and she knows he means it sincerely. "my hands are so soft, i might have to make this manicure thing a regular occurrence"

she laughs

"goodnight, mulder"

"goodnight, scully"

in the morning, the first thing she notices is the blue of her fingernail polish, and the warm feeling it gives her stays with her through breakfast and all the way through the afternoon

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Raise Your Voices Chapter 9: Nichts Soll Uns Scheiden Von Der Liebe Gottes

After a looong hiatus, we’re back! You can read my explanation/apology in the chapter. Long story short, college is hard and I need to be inconsistent with updates, but I love this story and I refuse to give up on it. I missed y’all🩷

Chapter Summary: As solo auditions roll around, Mulder and Scully keep their eyes out for possible suspects, but unexpected developments throw them both for a loop.

Fic Summary: Mulder and Scully are plucked from their supernatural routine to go undercover in a Vermont-Based Community Choir. Seeing as neither of them have ever been in a Vermont-Based Community Choir, appropriate amounts of chaos ensue.

Tagging @today-in-fic ! Yay!

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Jet

General Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply | Gen | English

Fandom: The X-Files

Characters: Dana Scully, Fox Mulder

Additional tags: Hurt/Comfort, Worry, Rescue, Calloween, Calloween 2024

Summary:

The figure looked out across the tarmac with a sweeping glance, lingering only for a moment on Scully, before retreating into the cabin once again, leaving the soldiers behind to flank the door. A chill went down Scully's spine that had nothing to do with the weather, and despite the fact that she would hardly have been visible against the black background in the dark, let alone recognisable, she was left with an uncomfortable feeling of having been sized up and committed to memory. It was a minute or so before anyone else came out of the aircraft, and when the next figure appeared, Scully drew in a sharp breath involuntarily. -or- Acting on a tip, Scully goes to Washington National Airport to meet an aircraft that hopefully contains her missing partner. ABSOLUTELY 0% SPOILERS FOR ANYTHING

Link to AO3 | Part 9 of Calloween 2024

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leiascully

X-Files OctoberFicFest Day 7: Wetwired

Scully drawing on him, her blue eyes wild. Scully with her gun leveled at him. Scully in the shadows of her mother’s house like some creature in its den.

He had felt her slipping away. He hadn’t understood it. She had flicked her eyes sideways at him in the car like she was assessing her chances of pitching herself out the door. It had stung like a paper cut, a swift slice that throbbed for hours.

Scully didn’t trust him. Some outside force had slipped a wedge between them. He hadn’t thought it was possible anymore: their bond exceeded anything he’d known. Scully was incorruptible. Maybe there had been some rot at the heart of them that he hadn’t understood. Something had festered, maybe since the beginning. Maybe it was the loss of her sister that had tipped her over the edge, or hell, her dog.

She had fired at him. Worse, she had fired at a civilian. What were a few bullets between partners? But to fire on a civilian was out of character, out of line. It wasn’t Scully.

The sinister signal had slipped into her mind and warped something in it. What did she see when she looked at him? Did he stink of cigarettes, in her imagination? Was he a war criminal or a wicked scientist? Was he Pfaster or Boggs or Tooms? Or worst of all, was he himself? Maybe she’d always been waiting for his betrayal.

His heart had stopped when the police had called. There was no bracing himself against the possibility of seeing her lovely face turned waxen, a death mask. He’d whispered a silent apology to the corpse for the relief he’d felt. Surely Jane Doe hadn’t deserved to die. Whoever she was, she deserved justice. He wasn’t going to give it to her, but it ached all the same, under the dizzy rush of euphoria that she wasn’t Scully.

He’d found Scully hiding with her mother, alive but not herself. Unwell. Feral and fierce, a Jersey Devil trapped in a suburban Maryland home. He couldn’t get through to her. When he reached for her, she snarled, caged in her own mind. She had shot him before to save him. That wouldn’t be her aim this time. He remembered their conversation on the rock. In her mind, he could play the part of the fanatic pushed beyond all reason. What was there to do with a mad dog but put it down?

Maggie had a softer touch. She held out her hand and Scully surrendered, saved by motherlove. It was astonishing to watch. He had forgotten that kind of maternal tenderness. He’d only experienced it in a dilute version, standing in for Scully when she’d been abducted. It warmed his heart and broke it all at once. But she was safe. That was what mattered. That was the only thing that mattered.

The cleanup of the evidence had been completed in his absence, as Mr. X had assured him it would, but Scully would be all right. He would make that choice every time.

Maybe one day she’d believe it.

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Plug

General Audiences | No Archive Warnings Apply | Gen | English

Fandom: The X-Files

Characters: Fox Mulder, Dana Scully

Additional tags: Drabble Sequence, Hurt/Comfort, Drowning, Calloween, Calloween 2024, Rescue

Summary:

Scully’s hair wafted around her face as she worked, her eyes stinging from the saline and her clothes complicating every movement, but she pushed all thoughts aside apart from one. Save Mulder. -or- Time is running out for Mulder, trapped at the bottom of a harbour. Will Scully reach him before it's too late? ABSOLUTELY 0% SPOILERS FOR ANYTHING

Link to AO3 | Part 3 of Calloween 2024

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To all my Raise Your Voices followers - I promise this fic is not left behind. I’ve been very busy with college, and have been struggling to find time to write, but I literally think about the story every day. The rest of it is outlined and the next 4 chapters are drafted, I just have a rule for myself that I always need to write a new chapter before I post (it keeps me accountable).

Thank you all for your patience, and I hope you’ll be willing to come back to the story when I can post again❤️❤️❤️

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For the 40 questions game: 7, 17, 30, and 33 please :)

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Tysm for the ask! I always appreciate you❤️

The game is here.

7) Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

You indulge me!

His free hand reaches up to cup her face, to stabilize her even though she’s supposed to be the one doing the mending, piecing him together. She and Mulder live in a constant state of piecing one another together, she thinks. Maybe she once knew how to exist otherwise, but now they exist symbiotically, always on the verge of destruction, each of them the only thing guarding the other from falling to pieces.

“Scully, how could anybody worry about me when I’ve got you?”

This is the fic where I felt like I was able to incorporate a lot of what I learned from other writers in the fandom, and I was really proud of how I was able to use dramatic wordplay woven with introspection. It’s something I love reading, but hadn’t really written before this fic. I looked at this passage and thought Wow! One of the writers I follow could have written this, and that felt really awesome:)

17) Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

I’m a believer in outlines, so I always outline and then I go from start to finish! I feel like it’s best for me to do it that way so I can evolve along with the characters and the story, especially for multichapter fics. That being said, a lot of my writing comes from playing scenes in my head before I even go near my computer, and those are never in order. I usually have a favorite scene or two that I’ll replay until I finally get to write them.

30) Do you accept prompts?

I cherish prompts! I can’t promise prompt completion at any specific time because I am a very busy college student, but I love adding new ideas to my ideas note, and the thought of making something as a gift for someone else truly warms my heart. So please send those prompts😊

33) How do you feel about crack?

I cannot write it. The closest I get is being self-indulgent and a little weird (à la the folksy community choir from Raise Your Voices - which is not discontinued by the way!) I’m not very funny so I tend to steer clear of that. I don’t usually read it, either, but I might if it’s recommended to me and it’s really good.

Thanks for the ask! It’s a busy week and I look forward to answering these:)

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hardest fic to write and most fun fic to write?

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Ooh I LOVE this ask! Thanks for sending!

I have two answers for hardest.

-First is Beneath the Ice, Beneath My Skin. This was my first TXF fic, and I was very nervous about writing Scully and Mulder for the first time and entering this established fandom full of highly prolific writers. It was also the first time I’d written in a while, so it took a bit for me to remember how. This fic also features slow possession from inside a character’s head, which was just plain difficult to do. I will say that I was ultimately very happy with how Scully’s POV turned out here.

-Coincidentally, the second is Caught on Tape, my most recent fic! This one was tricky for me because it’s much angstier than what I usually do, and I went into it with a premise but not much of an idea of what would be said on the tapes. This proves difficult, because the things Mulder says on the tapes are much more raw and emotional than we usually get on the show (due to the nature of what the tapes are). This made it quite hard for me to keep the writing in character, and I second guessed myself a lot. Many many thanks to @theswisscheeserag for beta-ing this - she made it SO MUCH better.

I have two for most fun as well😊

-First is Save Me from the Fire, which I wrote right after I first watched Our Town (the episode it’s based on). It was one of those fics where I watched the episode, the idea came to me right away, I sat down to write it, and it just flowed. Plus it’s a rescue fic and Scully gets to be the hero and I got to write about Mulder’s guilt complex, and those are my favorite things!

-Second is, of course, Raise Your Voices. This is really just my self-indulgent love child of a fic where I nerd out about folk music and TXF all at once. I feel like I’m treating myself to something sweet whenever I work on it, and I love feeling like I’m back on tour with my choir, and making jokes about the world so dear to me through the lens of some less folksy FBI agents. I did not expect anyone but me to enjoy this since the premise is so niche, so I’ve been pleasantly surprised at the reception!

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Caught on Tape

Summary: One late night at the office, Scully finds some strange tapes buried in the bottom of Mulder's desk. What she finds could fundamentally alter the way she views her partner - and their relationship.

Or: Mulder made tapes for Scully while she was abducted. One night she finds them.

Look, I may be in Season 4, but I will always mentally be in Season 2. The abduction arc is so dear to me, and means so much for both characters.

Rating: Teen and Up

Word Count: 4,044

TW/CW: Suicidal ideation, near-suicide attempt, references to abduction.

HUGE thanks to @theswisscheeserag for beta-ing this one. This fic was a struggle, and she really saved it from succumbing to all of my bad writing habits, so y’all have her to thank for that.

Tagging @today-in-fic :)

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okay, same question for you: where did your strangest fic inspiration come from? :)

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Hmm I’m not sure I have a great answer for this one. Most of my episode-based fics are just inspired by the episodes themselves, and I write them as inspiration strikes since I’m watching for the first time.

But Raise Your Voices probably takes this title. It’s inspired by my actual experiences in a community choir, and the idea came to me while I was on a concert tour. I was performing folk music every night and also writing while I was there and then all of a sudden I was just like WHAT IF I PUT THEM IN A COMMUNITY CHOIR?!

Several of the Raise Your Voices characters are based off of real people from my community choir, though their personalities have all been exaggerated for comedic purposes.

Thanks for the ask!

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🎨 If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

Oh my GOSH I do not consider myself to be a very well known writer and definitely not the kind of writer people make art for but if somebody did that for anything I wrote I would be absolutely over the MOON.

I feel like the endings of Flight and Sanctuary and Save Me from the Fire would make a good split-screen-type fanart because they’re sort of inverses of each other. (Starry night/Sunrise & final lines “Can we stay out here? Just for tonight.” “For you, I’d stay anywhere.”/“Thanks for coming after me.” “Always.”)

But seriously if anyone made any fanart for any of my fics ever I might just collapse from joy so don’t take this as me being picky.

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Raise Your Voices Chapter 8: Deep Peace

Chapter Summary: Scully deepens a friendship.

Fic Summary: Mulder and Scully are plucked from their supernatural routine to go undercover in a Vermont-Based Community Choir. Seeing as neither of them have ever been in a Vermont-Based Community Choir, appropriate amounts of chaos ensue.

Tagging @today-in-fic

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