Haurchefant: I cannot describe how far I would go for you, what unspeakable acts I would do, what lines I would cross and what a person I would become, if you but asked.

Warrior of Light: You would give me the power to twist your very being?

Haurchefant: I trust that whichever way you twist me, no matter how far I must bend, it will be for the good of the world.

WoL: Haurchefant... I’m not worthy of being given that trust.

Haurchefant: If you have not yet proven yourself worthy, then no mortal ever will.

Alphinaud, zooming in the video camera on Haurchefant and WoL in the pool: “Two broooos, sittin in a hot tub, five feet apart cause they’re not gay!”

Haurchefant: *dramatically* “...I’m not sure actually. Until I fell in love with the Warrior of Light I thought my attraction to the male gender was purely physical.”

Artoirel and Emmanellain: “...”

Artoirel: “So you thought you were gay... then you realized you were even more gay.”

Noctis, teaching the WoL to drive the Regalia: “Okay, you’re driving and Estinien and Haurchefant walk onto the road. Quick, what do you hit?”

WoL: “Oh, definitely Estinien. I could never hurt Haurchefant…”

Noctis, massaging his temples: “The brakes, you… You hit the brakes…”

Haurchefant to his brothers, probably

Please Don’t Take My Sunshine Away (WoL x G’raha Tia Headcanon - 5.0 Spoilers)

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine”

G’raha Tia slumped to the ground and the WoL simply cannot breathe- whatever air the Light hadn’t yanked out of their lungs were gone.

Emet-Selch was standing there, smugly.

“You make me happy when sky’s are gray”

Haurchefant collapsed, slumping down to the ground as horror drilled through the WoL’s heart. His shield had been pierced, as had his body.

Ser Zephirin was standing there, smugly.

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you”

They couldn’t do this, not again. Not another love of their life snatched away in the final hour by their enemy. Their heart couldn’t handle it- the Light already threatened to burst from their chest as G’raha Tia is taken by Emet-Selch.

Please, not him. If I must die now, don’t let me lose him too.

Please.

“Please don’t take my sunshine away”