#i want to cry – @athousandbyeol on Tumblr

The last few episodes of The On1y One emphasized the casual public and private intimacy between Tian Yang and Shi Yu because they were more relaxed around each other since there was nothing queer happening between them. They were just two boys sleeping in a bed.

Compared to Wang and Tian who were restrained laying next to each other because they knew their feelings and what it would mean to touch each other.

Because even when they did touch in bed, it was nowhere near the entanglement of limbs that their roommates demonstrated. There was still a sense of self-control.

So because Wang and Tian know, they didn't touch each other like when Wang immediately pulled his hand from Tian even though he did need help walking. It was realizing his feelings, so he didn't want any touch to be publicly perceived as a gay touch.

Which is something that didn't happened between the other boys. So what if someone saw them touch? It wasn't gay. It was just a touch.

And we saw it again.

And again.

Knowing caused a barrier between the boys.

Because that barrier didn't exist with anyone else.

In the end, knowing was the problem.

#i want to cry #this post shouldn't make me rethink about tianwang at 2 am #i should be sleeping hours ago #but now i'm wide awake with this gnawing feeling inside of me #i hate it here #(this is a beautiful post. thank you op)#tianwang #the on1y one

athousandbyeol reblogged

tipsyjaehyun

The way Jiang Tian's literal/physical luggage also symbolises the emotional baggage that he carries makes me quite emotional.

We get introduced to "his suitcase" when he's about to move into Sheng Wang's place. He caresses his cat, taking in the environment around him because these are the things he's leaving behind. However, he has to carry his baggage with him.

He drags it along with him, unsure as to whether this new place that he's gonna be staying in would be welcoming of them. Though the house and the closet he might get would be big but it definitely would not be big enough for them to stay in.

That's why he starts looking for a new accomodation as soon as he's moved in. In his head and through his past experiences, there has been no place he could call his own. Every place that he's been to has been a temporary solace.

gif by @athousandbyeol

But Sheng Wang notices this. He sees this boy with the emotional weight he carries on his shoulders, closed off and unsure as to if he'll ever get to rest on somebody's shoulders. And I think that is why, along with surprise and sadness, Sheng Wang feels betrayed. In his mind, he and Jiang Tian were getting closer but seeing Jiang Tian so guarded, he assumes that the feelings may have been one-sided.

gif by @athousandbyeol

Even Uncle Ding mentions this.

So, Sheng Wang does exactly that. He doesn't let Jiang Tian get away. He "confronts" him to tell him the truth about the hooligans. He keeps Jiang Tian close.

gif by @usertoxicyaoi

But slowly and slowly as he and Sheng Wang start getting closer, he starts letting loose. Joking around, teasing each other, helping each other out, his heart starts shedding off the armour, one brick at a time, one cloth at a time.

gif by @usertoxicyaoi

The luggage that was chained and completely sealed is getting reopened. The clothes are being unpacked, feelings are being shared, conversations are happening and Jiang Tian is letting his guard down, without even realising it.