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@ask-eugene-h-krabs on Tumblr
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Ahoy there, Matey!

@ask-eugene-h-krabs

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Anonymous asked:

You love money, have military sailing experience, and you have sexual prowess to the 6th degree (at least!). Ever considered piracy??

Th' statute o' limitations ain't quite run out on me time in the South China and Argentine Seas, so I'm not at liberty ter discuss th' matter in full.

But when it do, oh th' stories an ol' man could tell...

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have you ever listened to glorb

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Arrrgh, th’ rap artist who use an AI filter ter sound like me, eh?

On th’ one claw, I do have a fully rational fear o’ robot overlords. Ye’ll ne’er see AI-generated content on this blog passed off as me work.

But ter give credit where due, th’ feller seems ter do all th’ lyrics an’ production legit, an’ animates th’ music videos th’ same way. I ain’t an expert, but it sounds like they do th’ vocals, too, and jus’ put it through a filter after.

I say let th’ feller have fun makin’ silly videos. It ain’t pretendin’ ter be something it aren’t, people be havin’ fun wit’ it, an’ there’s real creativity bein’ shown underneat’ th’ AI gimmick.

Plus, th’ feller knows I’m a menace wit’ me tool.

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Anonymous asked:

I’m going to buy your menu. Not the items on it, just the sign for it in general.

That ain't a thing ye kin take!

"They are free!"

No they ain't! They ain't free! Ye can't- ye can't take one, yer a thief if ye take one! Ye cannot just take these things from stores!

"But they're free!"

They ain't free! Ye can't take em!

"No price tag!"

Fuck ye!

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Oh fuck he is right behind me.

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Anonymous asked:

I’m going to buy your menu. Not the items on it, just the sign for it in general.

That ain't a thing ye kin take!

"They are free!"

No they ain't! They ain't free! Ye can't- ye can't take one, yer a thief if ye take one! Ye cannot just take these things from stores!

"But they're free!"

They ain't free! Ye can't take em!

"No price tag!"

Fuck ye!

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Anonymous asked:

how fuckable is spongebob

Th' boy be one o' those asexuals ye hear about, 'e doesn't really "fuck" much.

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Thinking about getting a car soon. Do you have any suggestions? I want something that's small so I can park wherever

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Just jury-rig a janitorial scrubber inter an improvised zamboni.

Might wanna avoid highways er places wit' minimum speeds, though.

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Anonymous asked:

how fuckable is money

I sold me soul ter th' devil ter make money sentient, just so it could pass th' Harkness Test.

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