[x]

i lost my shit in the breakroom at work. ne er woulda fukken guessed in a million years.

Glad there are people who understand that

here is why this is NOT true. white people are MARRIED to the racial construct that is “whiteness.” not flirting, not dating, not texting, not sexting, not engaged to.. married. long term. and as such they make decision in favor of their race out of motivation to see their race succeed. they’ve built an entire country on the premise of giving white people a leg up on everyone even if it meant the use of brutal force in additional to lies, half truths and etc. this is the very basis of whiteness upon which white people of built their idea of self. you CAN NOT be pro-black without being anti-white because pro-blackness calls for the destruction of white supremacy and white privilege which undergirds whiteness and white identity. it’s like stokely carmichael said “for racism to die, a totally different america must be born. this is what the white society does not wish to face; this is why that society prefers to talk about integration. but integration speaks not at all to the problem of poverty, only to the problem of blackness. integration today means the man who ‘makes it,’ leaving his black brothers behind in the ghetto as fast as his new sports car will take him. it has no relevance to the harlem wino or to the cotton-picker making three dollars a day…. integration, moreover, speaks to the problem of blackness in a despicable way. as a goal, it has been based on complete acceptance of the fact that in order to have a decent house or education, blacks must move into a white neighborhood or send their children to a white school. this reinforces, among both black and white, the idea that ‘white’ is automatically better and ‘black’ is by definition inferior.”

there’s a reason why whenever black people talk about racism, white supremacy, white privilege, white ignorance, white inaction and etc, white people overall lose their shit. the reason is because white people have built their entire sense of self on whiteness which is built on lies and oppression. to be pro-black is to be anti-white. as long as white people define themselves in any way shape or form with whiteness as a social construct, pro-blackness will ALWAYS be ANTI-WHITE. always. 

and bullshit like this just makes wonder why? is still about being in white people’s good graces? why? after EVERYTHING white people have done and continue to do to black people, why the flying fuck do you care of your pro-blackness is anti-white? this is some fuckery to still care what your slavemaster still thinks about you and your movement to gain your freedom. reminds me again of what stokely carmichael said “black power can be clearly defined for those who do not attach the fears of white america to their questions about it.“ 

you think such nonsensical thinking is going to stop white oppression? white people see racism as a zero sum game! and millennials? millennials are just as racist as their parents! 

and please, miss me with the “not all white people” nonsense.

I like how OP’S message was positive and actually seems like it came from the concept of equality but then….this person chimes in and reminds me of everything wrong with this movement’s members and why I don’t care to associate with it. Good job. -Billy

As an educated black guy sadly I somewhat have to agree If you want an example of how the second person’s rant is true my step mom who is very successful knows a lot of white people but doesn’t associate with a lot of black people and when she was naming my little sister she named her “Madison” instead of a “ghetto name” in fear that when would not get a respectable job simply on her name. *Sigh* Really this mindset is made because in a way it is the only way black people will have any way of getting ahead even if it means stepping over the one who can’t

your mom had to be conscious of how white people would treat your sister because white people who have adopted whiteness (which is the OVERWHELMING MAJORITY) aren’t going to call back your sister if she submits a resume with a black sounding name. that’s white people because that’s whiteness. you can not be pro-black without being anti-white because these are the social norms and constructs that white people not only have created but continue to perpetuate till this day. 

as someone with hiring power, i go out of my way to look for black people to hire because i know that my hr department filled with WHITE PEOPLE aren’t going to give tyrone, laquisha, malik, kenyatta or kiesha a fucking chance no matter how talented they are. why? because white people have been programmed by whiteness to see black people as inferior. to fight against that will bring head on with white people and whiteness.

however let’s be real. there’s no changing a group of people who can’t even admit that enjoy privilege in this society, can never admit or do right by natives, made a holiday celebrating a man who discovered nothing but killed and enslaved thousands (if not millions), etched into the side of a mountain racists and slave owners, turned “monday” into a slur, responds to any highlighting of their own criminality with “what about black on black crime tho?,” and made it a point to silence black people responding to a history of brutal racist policing with “all lives matter.” hell white people are powering the push the presidency of a man who has been so over the top with his racism, it feels like a throwback to the 60s and 70s when white people running for office would say shit like “elect me and i’ll make sure no nigger…” so no, this post isn’t for white people. i expect them to come up with all types of excuses. truth is not a part of their culture. it’s for black people to wake up and stop worrying about white people and whether or not they think the black movement for our liberation is “anti-white.” fuck’em. we owe them NOTHING. and guess what, it’s going to get anti-white because nothing about whiteness respects blackness. so stop trying to please them.

lastly, if you’re pro-black and you don’t make white people nervous…

I fux with @alwaysbewoke forever for breaking this reality down to its most essential. In a country founded upon white supremacy being pro-Black IS being “anti-white.” And if you, as a Black person, can only be your pro-Black self when/if you can balance that with white folks feelings in mind… just go ahead and become a 100% generically American dark-skinned white person. That’ll be easier for you than attempting to become a cracker-approved pro-Black person.

This is hard to agree with. Because I for sure don’t give a damn about the approval from white people, but I’m not anti-white. I can sit down and be around white people. I have white friends. I find some white people genuinely fun to be around. But these are white people who respect me and my opinions, who never cross that line of being disrespectful, or who are blinded by their white privilege. You don’t have to dislike white people to love yourself.

I’m pro black because I’m black and I love it and I stand behind it and it’ll forever be apart of me in every aspect and I accept it. It don’t have shit to do with a white Person.

I don’t hate white people, I just love myself.

^^^there we go

@aherringwrites  

you’ve decided to overlook a very important part in my statement. white people who have adopted whiteness. whiteness as an ideology has no respect for blackness. that is a historical fact. across the world, white people who have adopted whiteness have belittled, raped, plundered and even murdered people of color. “whiteness” isn’t “i was born white” or “i’m a white boy, girl, man or woman. whiteness is a way of viewing yourself, the world, your relationship to the world and the resulting cultural norms, ideas, policies and actions that come out of that. as such whiteness hold no regard or respect for blackness and the vast vast vast VAST majority of white people have adopted whiteness. worse still, whiteness as an ideology is something adopted by even NON-white people as well including black people (see stacey dash, don lemon). it is something that can also be rejected as well as adopted and no truly anti-racist fails to reject whiteness.

this is what whiteness does to black people

WHITENESS WON’T GIVE BLACK KIDS IN NEED OF PAIN MEDICATION THE AMOUNT NEEDED BECAUSE THEY BELIEVE BLACK PEOPLE CAN JUST HANDLE PAIN!!

WHITENESS IS KILLING A 12 YEAR OLD BLACK KID PLAYING ALONE WITH A TOY AND THEN DEFAMING HIM BY CALLING HIM A THUG AND BRINGING UP HIS PARENTS CRIMINAL HISTORY!!

WHITENESS IS SHEDDING TEARS OVER A GORILLA BUT TELLING BLACK PEOPLE THEY SHOULD SHUT UP ABOUT BEING KILLED BY COPS!!

WHITENESS IS DEMANDING THAT BLACK PEOPLE MOURN THE DEATH OF COPS WHO MOST LIKELY WOULD PROFILE THEM, ABUSE THEM, KILL THEM AND COVER IT UP!!

WHITENESS IS CREATING THE MYTH CALLED “BLACK ON BLACK CRIME” AND USING IT TO HALT ANY DISCUSSION OR MOVEMENT AGAINST THE VIOLENCE OF WHITE SUPREMACY!! (MORE HERE & HERE)

WHITENESS IS WHITE PEOPLE OVERWHELMING GIVING AMERICAN POLICE A POSITIVE RATING WHILE THEY KILL US!!

WHITENESS IS SAYING THAT THE BLACK PANTHERS WERE JUST LIKE THE KKK!!

WHITENESS IS SEEING RACISM AS ZERO SUM GAME!!!

WHITENESS STARTING A FALSE DRUG WAR TO STOP THE ADVANCEMENT OF BLACK PEOPLE!!

WHITENESS IS DESIRING TO GO BACK TO THE 1950’S SO THEY CAN LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE BLACK PEOPLE ARE MORE OPPRESSED!!

WHITENESS IS WHITE PEOPLE CREATING GHETTOS THROUGH REDLINING, STEERING, HOUSING DISCRIMINATION AND THEN BLAMING BLACK PEOPLE FOR THEM!! (AND IT’S STILL HAPPENING)

WHITENESS IS MOCKING SOMEONE ELSE’S CULTURE, STEALING IT AND THEN KILLING YOU OVER IT!!

WHITENESS IS SAYING THAT BLACK PEOPLE ARE PRONE TO CRIMINALITY EVEN THOUGH NO ONE COMMITS MORE CRIMES THAN WHITE PEOPLE AND WHITE PEOPLE ARE CONSIDERED THE COUNTRY’S BIGGEST TERROR THREAT!!

WHITENESS IS OPPRESSING BLACK PEOPLE AND THEN BLAMING THEM FOR SAID OPPRESSION!!

WHITENESS IS THE INABILITY TO DEAL WITH ANY HONEST CONVERSATION ABOUT RACE AND RACISM!! (MORE HERE)

Now none of this has anything to do with self love. This has everything to do with the reality that one can not be pro-black WITHOUT being anti-white because ^THIS^ is whiteness. 

I have never met a white person who was TRULY anti-racist who didn’t denounce whiteness. not one. 

I would suggest the following readings:

never forget that whiteness is the foundation of white supremacy and…

so while you’re here trying to make sure white people feel good and safe about you and your desire for freedom, they are in everyday life and in everyday practices supporting your violent oppression. either directly or indirectly, overtly or covertly. 

never forget the mlk white people never want to quote.

A-spec people don't experience oppression?

This is built up of links and screenshots I’ve seen (basically this is all either my links or copy and paste)

“Aces don’t face oppression”

Asexuality was listed in the DSM as HSDD (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder) until 2013, making it officially a mental illness that would be treated with therapy and medication. It is still in the DSM, except that you can ‘opt out’ if you self-identify as asexual, which is great except that asexuality is still so unknown that there undoubtedly many people who are asexual but don’t know that it’s “a thing”. This means that who knows how many asexuals have been sent to therapy and told they’re sick, then been “treated” for their orientation to try and force them to experience sexuality “correctly”.

In short, our orientation has been and continues to be pathologized, and asexuals have been put through corrective therapy: x, x, x, x, x

Posts of people describing the hardship they’ve faced for their asexuality: x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x

The blog @acephobia-is-real has so many submissions and examples of hatred, harassment, hostility, and abuse, of aces who have been raped and/or sexually assaulted in an attempt to ‘fix’ them, and made suicidal due to aphobia and/or their own perceived brokenness, that it would be pointless for me to try and link any. Just go and start reading. Try their suicide tag.

There may be dissatisfyingly little research done on asexuality, but there has been enough done to prove that they do face discrimination, no matter how hard some may find that to believe. But guess what? A non-ace person does not get a say and waht they do or do not experience. We do not get to say things like “aces don’t get kicked out” or “aces don’t _____” any more than I as a white person get to say that things I don’t experience must not happen to black people either. Just because you haven’t experienced it personally or witnessed it with your own eyes doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. You haven’t walked in an ace’s shoes, you don’t know what they deal with. Period. You have no right.

Not even other aces can tell asexuals that their experiences aren’t real or aren’t valid. Different people can deal with different amounts of oppression, that doesn’t mean the lack of oppression is the default “truth”.

Nobody is trying to say that asexuals have it “as bad” or worse than gay or trans people, but a-specs don’t HAVE to “have it worse” to be included and for others experiences to have merit without being compared to anyone else’s. What s-specs go through, still matters and should not be compared to what others have gone through in order to matter.

“We just want to protect our safe spaces”

Aphobes have:

Are all aphobes this vile? Maybe not, but this is still the disgusting, hateful attitude festering in the gatekeeping community, and it stinks like shit. The examples that have been provided above are only a fraction of the harassment and abuse that is perpetrated on a regular basis.

“Het aces/aroaces are straight”

Some het aces identify as straight. Some het aces don’t identify as straight, they identify as asexual, and it’s not your place to label them against their will. Even other a-specs dont get to do that to others, There is no world in which aroaces, people who experience no attraction to anyone, are straight.

“We accept SGA (same-gender attracted) and trans aces”

Firstly, SGA (same-gender attraction) is a term that was used and is still used in Mormon conversion therapy, so as one can understand, a lot of people are very uncomfortable being labeled with this description. Secondly, it enforces a gender binary of “same” and “opposite” gender that leaves a large number of nonbinary people out in the cold. Is a genderfluid person only “same-gender attracted” if they’re attracted to other genderfluid people who are genderfluid in exactly the same way? How about agender, intergender, demigirl/boy people? And before the argument “well they’re included as trans” is made, there are plenty of nonbinary people who do not identify as trans. You do not have the right to label people against their will.

The standard of “SGA and trans” as requirement for entry to the LGBTQ community is used nowhere outside of aphobic tumblr, and it seems crafted specifically for the purpose of excluding aces, aros, NBs, intersex people, and others not deemed “gay enough”.

(SGA did NOT come from ‘SGL’, same-gender loving. That is a term created by black queer people and not to be appropriated by white people.)

Discussion of the history of the word ‘queer’ and why it’s better than ‘SGA’: x, x, x, x, x

There are also many “SGA and trans” aces who are against the gatekeeping and feel that they are hated by these aphobes.

Your “discourse” is harmful to all asexuals. And by the way, your rhetoric is literally indistinguishable from TWERF rhetoric.

“The LGBT community has always been about fighting homophobia and transphobia/we came together to fight homophobia and transphobia”

Despite the fact that bisexual and transgender people have always been around, and have done great things for the community, they have faced a great deal of lateral oppression from the LG part of the group that did not want to see them get an equal share of attention, support, or legitimacy. This post is not about proving LG transphobia and biphobia, but it’s so rampant that I don’t feel like I need to provide sources whatsoever. Nevertheless, here’s a collection of biphobia, and the blog @terf-callout documents some of the violent transphobia on this site, particularly in the lesbian community. This post is an example.

“The A stands for Ally so that closeted people can be the community without being outed”

No one is saying that we don’t care about closeted people, but a) even if you’re a closeted L, G, B, or T, you are still a L, G, B, or T. Allies do not need to be part of the acronym to be intrinsically welcomed. As someone said, this is like saying the ‘B’ in BLT stands for ‘bread’. We can pretty much safely assume that a sandwich is going to include bread, we don’t have to go of our way to give it a letter. Either you are outing every “ally” as a closeted queer person, or you are giving 100% cis straight people an LGBTQ member card, the very thing you are arguing against by trying to exclude asexuals.

Furthermore, this puts forth the argument “I’m willing to let cishet straight people into the community for the sake of a few closeted people” while at the same time stating “I’m not willing to let the A stand for asexuals because I don’t think letting cis heteroromantic asexuals into the community is worth giving all asexuals representation and support”. Which says that you consider asexuals less valuable and more of a threat than cis straight people.

Bonus: The History of LGBT(QQIAAP+)

“Aces have never been a part of the LGBTQ/queer community”

“Stop tokenizing bi and trans people/stop comparing bi/trans and ace experiences”

A-specs are  not the ones doing it. We are comparing it. However, when we do, we are labeled bi-phobic/transphobic

“I have proof of an asexual being homophobic/transphobic/racist/a terrible person”

Of course there are asexuals who are terrible people. There are legions of gays and lesbians who are racist and transphobic. Does that make them not gay/lesbian? Does their bigotry invalidate their sexual orientation, or remove the L and G from the acronym? No, I don’t think so. Some asexuals being bad people doesn’t justify you trying to invalidate all of us.

“’Allosexual’ is a bad word because ____”

I actually have an ‘allosexual’ tag just for posts about why ‘allosexual’ is a perfectly fine word: x, x, x, x, x. x. It simply means non-ace. You do not have to use it for yourself if you do no want to, however.

“The split-attraction model is homophobic”

What we call the split-attraction model was first described by Karl Heinrich Ulrichs, a gay advocate from the 1800s, as “disjunctive uranodioning”. (source) (credit to this post)

“The term ‘corrective rape’ was coined by South African lesbians and should only be used by lesbians”

No one means any disrespect to lesbians or other victims of corrective rape, but this is not a correct statement.

“We’ll Show You You’re a Woman” describes the violence directed towards LGBT people in South Africa, stating, “Negative public attitudes towards homosexuality go hand in hand with a broader pattern of discrimination, violence, hatred, and extreme prejudice against people known or assumed to be lesbian, gay, and transgender, or those who violate gender and sexual norms in appearance or conduct (such as women playing soccer, dressing in a masculine manner, and refusing to date men).” It goes on to say, “Much of the recent media coverage of violence against lesbians and transgender men has been characterized by a focus on “corrective rape,” a phenomenon in which men rape people they presume or know to be lesbians in order to “convert” them to heterosexuality.”

The Wikipedia article on corrective rape in South Africa states that, “A study conducted by OUT LGBT Well-being and the University of South Africa Centre for Applied Psychology (UCAP) showed that “the percentage of black gay men who said they have experienced corrective rape matched that of the black lesbians who partook in the study”.”

It is not only lesbians, but also bisexual women, transgender men, gay men, and gender non-conforming people in South Africa who experience corrective rape. This is not in any way meant to minimize the horror of the epidemic or shift attention away from lesbians, but other victims, including asexuals, deserve attention as well. Do not silence or speak over victims of rape by policing their language.

“Aces are valid, they’re just not queer/LGBTQ”

You cannot in one breath say “Asexuals are valid” and in the next deny their experiences. Spend five minutes in the community and you will see testimony after testimony from aces describing their abuse, their sexual assault(s), the countless times people have called them confused, broken, wrong, mentally ill, inhuman, sinful, and how these experiences have left them feeling hopeless, alone, alienated, subhuman, depressed, and suicidal. Almost every asexual out there will tell you a story of how their orientation has caused them pain and struggle, and you can’t call them valid while at the same time calling these experiences invalid and nonexistent.

Bonus: This is a list of all the mainstream LGBTQ groups that include asexuals.

“Form your own community!”

a) We do have our own community, because every letter in the acronym has its own community and yet is still part of the acronym, b) you fucking shits won’t stop sending us hate and bombarding us with shit meant to trigger and harass us.

“Aces take resources from other LGBTQ who need them”

I’ve seen some pretty wild claims about this one, insisting that asexuals “steal” things such as scholarships, beds at homeless shelters, food and space at pride events, suicide hotlines, and so on, yet I have never seen any actual proof that any “stealing” has ever taken place. For one thing, I thought “you’ll never get kicked out or fired for being ace”, “no one is suicidal because they’re asexual”, so why would you think aces need these resources? Either we don’t need them or we don’t use them, you can’t have it both ways.

For another, how heartless do you have to be to tell asexuals that they can’t use suicide hotlines? Do you realize that you’re saying that asexuals should be denied life-saving services? That, in essence, asexuals are suicidal due to their orientation, but you think they’re not “queer enough” so they deserve to die? Because that is the logical progression of refusing someone suicide prevention, and that’s the message aces receive when you tell them they are “stealing” suicide prevention.

LGBTQ resources offer them to asexuals, and benefit from us using them.

“Rae, asexual, 26, Maryland: No, I don’t feel accepted in the queer community. In college, I tried being out about being asexual. The result was a gay guy who lived in my building walking into my dorm room, exposing himself, and walking toward me, pants around his ankles, while describing what he was sure would cure me. Asexuality became a topic I only discussed with significant others or when someone else brought it up first. I’m pretty sure as far as the queer community is concerned, I’m straight.”

Julie Decker, “[she] has been told by several online commenters that she just needs a “good raping.”

“Also, I hope you get raped.”

“I’ve gotten several awful comments along the lines of “well I could fix that” though when I’ve brought up my asexuality…”

“My assailant maintained that what he was doing would make me realize that I wasn’t asexual or queer…”

AVEN thread– yes, ugh, AVEN, but look at the poll here– “Have you ever been threatened with sexual assault because of your asexuality?”

Here’s some choice replies from that thread:

Personal experience:  IM NOT A-SPEC! These are comments I’ve received about dating one though

and more but Im kinda starting to feel ill

(I dont like the anon but they called them straight when the anon SPECIFICALLY says they’re biromantic)

https://youtu.be/FNiMWEMBONQ

https://youtu.be/3vIwERgoDDc

I’m bisexual and genderfluid. All I see from the a-spec discourse is recycled bi-phobia and people being bigoted in the lgbt+ community. You need to stop. People are getting hurt on both sides and it needs to come to an end right now. This discourse should not exist as much as the terf discourse should not exist. You are denying people a place in lgbt+ who belong there. 

Read this post before asking me how asexuals are oppressed.

there should be an app called ace mates for ace ppl who want a friend to grow old with and share rent without any relationships or complicated love stuff. kinda like dan and phil, ya know?