Property of Joker PROPERTY OF NO ONE

150 days of harley quinn — day 144

Batman: Babysitter

wayne enterprises almost certainly has clothing as one of their retail subsidiaries and i like to imagine it getting really profitable just because bruce spends so much time listening to models bitch at parties. all of their product lines have names like “It Has Real Pockets” and “Not See-Through” and “Full-Length Sleeves” and “Secret Elastic Waist”. the marketing department is like “okay obviously these are all working titles” and bruce is like “no. leave it. that is what it’s called.” and they try to talk him out of it but he owns a helicopter and you can’t argue with a man who owns a helicopter. they sell so fast. the women of gotham are well-dressed and comfortable and always have somewhere to keep their phones.

The tags are also gold: 

#original#the problems they are solving get more obscure as time goes on#jeans forgiving enough that you can kick someone in the face#reinforced thighs to account for friction#boyfriend jeans renamed comfy jeans#Won’t Show Your Bra#More Than One Size#it starts as a whim he just emails whoever is in charge of that department like#‘for the love of god just give them some fucking pockets’#if anyone appreciates the importance of pockets it’s batman#look at his belt#being without pockets is like his nightmare#if he has to help one more person figure out where in his enormous fucking mansion they left their fucking clutch#that they only brought because they didn’t have any goddamn pockets#he’s not going to be mad but he’ll be disappointed#wayne enterprises with bruce at the head sees a huge increase in profits and sometimes it is for the weirdest fucking reasons#am i the only one who wishes everything had an elastic waist#but secretly so i can still look classy

did you guys know that when someone tags me in one of their creations it adds a week to my life?? this is scientific fact okay. want me to live longer? tag me in things

The Defenders Cast crashing cosplay meet at SDCC 2017

Geoff Johns talked about how incredible Aquaman is, and this is a little compilation about what he said:

#she’s …. thor. #she’s thor - but better#i’m glad this is a thing people are coming around to#and i’m glad tonally they fit in the same shape #with gags like this#which are public ‘odd’ behaviour#but that the subject finds in no way a problem and in fact is glad to learn a new experience#and like for example - you know the thor gag where he goes to the pet store and asks for a horse#and is told they just have dogs/cats/birds and he goes ‘then give me one of those large enough to ride’#that is EXACTLY the sort of interaction that i can see this 2017 patty jenkins diana having#100% well-intentioned #100% fish out of water#but driven honest and determined#so that when that gag is set up you laugh at it but not reliant on humiliation#because both films take a long time to set up THEIR point of view first before they throw the gags at you#so you see their home - asgard or themyscira - you see what’s normal to them#and you understand that the stakes are high for them and you’re on board and empathise#so a moment like this that could be ‘lol look @ this dumb person’ instead reads as ‘YES YOU NEARLY GOT IT! YOU’RE DOING GREAT BB’#it’s an EARNED gag because it’s not a cheap shot at them coming as it does after such a detailed character intro (via @harrietvane)

MY FAVORITE BIT IS HOW FAST SHE REALIZES SHE CAN’T CHARGE IT BLADE FIRST, SHE’S GONNA HAVE TO BE STANDING VERY VERTICALLY TO FIT IN THE SPACE, SO SHE ANGLES THE SWORD UP– WHILE KEEPING IT AS READY AS POSSIBLE FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE–THEN SWITCHES SMOOTHLY INTO LEADING WITH THE SHIELD ONCE SHE’S IN TOO TIGHT A SPACE FOR THE SWORD TO BE EFFECTIVE ANYMORE. IF AN ENEMY WAS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THAT DOOR, OR IF THE DOOR *WAS* AN ENEMY, SHE’D BE IMPECCABLY READY FOR ACTION EVERY SINGLE MOMENT OF THIS EXIT. 

THAT IS WHAT’S SO COOL AND FUN ABOUT THIS GAG. DIANA IS AS MUCH A TRAINED WARRIOR WHEN SHE’S GOING THROUGH A REVOLVING DOOR AS SHE IS WHEN SHE’S THROWING A TANK. 

“I am the bearer of the torch and now I’m passing it forward to Gal and to Patty. I spoke with Patty early on and I couldn’t wait to meet Gal. The three of us share some sisterhood by living and breathing this character.” – Lynda Carter 

Tom Holland makes an entrance at the Spider-Man: Homecoming red carpet premiere

DC took Chris Pine so that Marvel couldn’t collect all the Chris’…it’s like when somebody blocks you from the last property in Monopoly so you don’t become too powerful.

poison ivy / harley quinn / catwoman

The DCEU is so unapologetically comic book and it makes me so happy like here’s aliens, an all female race of warriors, murderous clowns, a sword that steals souls, a 6000+ year old witch being forced to work for the government, a half human half robot, half human half crocodile… oh and Atlantis is real… and so are the Greek Gods bye 

interviewer: are you coming back for the 2020 olympics?

michael phelps: haha nahh i’ll be retiring

michael phelps: *gets a silver medal and ties with his rival, chad le clos*

michael phelps knowing that he’s going to tokyo in 2020: