mouthporn.net
@apsies on Tumblr
Avatar

@apsies / apsies.tumblr.com

A Dose of Liberal Political Commentary with a Smattering of Pop Culture. I teach middle school in real life. The views expressed here are my own and do not reflect my employer.
Avatar
reblogged
mrskaaay

Thinking about buying our in school suspension teacher a gift card to Liquor Barn since I can’t just bring him alcohol and I can hear the desperation in his voice after this week.

Avatar
apsies

I would chip in for this. Seriously. 

Avatar
reblogged

I decided to make some Valentines.

Avatar
benandbrew

TJ is the best.

sTOP

@luckysilverbell you might appreciate this

HOLY SHIT THIS IS GLORIOUS!!

Now you can send these to that special someone. Or yourself. Or burn them like most of the founders did with their love letters. (Except you, John Adams, you epistolary hoarder.)

Anyway all 12 are now available on Zazzle. Happy Presidents’ Day and Valentine’s Day!

Avatar
apsies

Amazing. 

Avatar
reblogged
mrskaaay

When it’s the Olympics themed Renaissance Rally and @apsies is all the best kinds of extra so you have the Olympic torch

Avatar
apsies

Yasssssss! 

Avatar
reblogged
Avatar
dvxdm
An analogy for life. (photos via thecrookedstep)

You’re thinking “is he really going to spend the whole book worrying?” and then it hits you

Fuck. I didn’t get it until the comment

Avatar

Tomorrow around 20 of my 8th graders are going to go back to their teacher from last year so that she can teach them U.S. History because we’ve got such a large bunch that they’re hiring another teacher. Today two of them cried because they were really excited to have me as a teacher this year. Breaks my dang heart, y’all. And there’s nothing I can do about it. 

Avatar

Hey tumblr,

I miss you. 

Who’s still around? What have you all been up to?

Avatar
reblogged

The sad thing is when you realize that Trump voters who will lose their health insurance...would still happily vote for him again.

What strange power does this man hold over them?

Avatar
apsies

These people would rather nobody have anything than some minorities and themselves have something

But, I mean, the whole election was over economic anxiety. Ahem. Sure. 

Avatar
Avatar
milqi

Top 10 Things I Wish I Could Put on the Comment Section of Report Cards

1.  Sleeps in class 2.  Literally stares into space the whole period 3.  Is under the impression physical attendance equals an automatic pass 4.  Mumbles, then complains the teacher doesn’t understand them 5.  Doesn’t understand what “put your phone away” means 6.  Comes to class stoned most of the time 7.  Makes a mess; never cleans after themselves 8.  Needs to shower… with soap 9.  Doesn’t understand what respect actually entails 10. Not nearly as intelligent as you believe

Bonus - Your child is turning me into an alcoholic

One of our comment codes is Sleeps in Class. I’ve definitely used it.

I want a “refuses to do work, but is confused why they’re failing” code.

Let’s also add: “calm the fuck down about getting an A-”

Avatar
apsies

Thinks “please be on a voice level zero” means “please blurt out every single thought currently running through your brain loud enough for the whole class to hear.”

Avatar

Vague Tumblring

I always find it interesting when people commit to voting for politicians because they took a picture with your kid or were really nice when you met them that one time. Like, sure, they might kill your grandma with their healthcare bill, take away your jobs, and give all your money to rich special interests, but they were lovely during your selfie. 

Just like I found it interesting when our student group met a Republican congressman during our capitol tour this spring and all of the chaperones walked away raving about how down to earth he was. 

Um, they’re politicians. That whole kissin’ babies thing didn’t come out of nowhere. 

Avatar
reblogged

I’ve been through so much professional development this year. It’s going to warrant a longer post at some point, but I just need to get this off of my chest.

Stop infantilizing teachers.

We do not need to sound out easily recognizable words syllable-by-syllable together. I’ll ask if I really don’t understand.

We do not need to “think-pair-share.” I will willingly talk to the person next to me without the jargon.

We do not need dance breaks. I just need to pee.

We do not need every acronym explained every time. You are not Rachael Ray and this is not EVOO. 

I could go on.

But really, just stop.

Stop infantilizing teachers.

Avatar

I have a small number of haters who are ruining my Friday night.

I can't imagine being a Clinton.

Avatar

Between DC trip week and spring break I haven't seen the inside of my school in 16 days.

The good news is I’m like 33 school days away from summer break. We’ve got this! 💪

Avatar
reblogged

TOO REAL, CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY

You are using an unsupported browser and things might not work as intended. Please make sure you're using the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Edge.
mouthporn.net