I Never Banished Any Lobsters to the Sea

TED LASSO 2.02 ♡ Lavender

inspired by this silly tweet:

TED LASSO (2020 - ) S03E09 · La Locker Room Aux Folles

guy who says "FUCK!" to every minor inconvenience x guy who says "oopsie daisies" to earth shattering catastrophes

Here is my contribution to the fandom

I call it "The Bi Ted Thesis"

Ted Lasso through the seasons: Colin & Isaac

marcus mumford voice YYYYEEEEAAAAHHHH ⚽️

Best of Jamie Tartt in Season 3

Moe Bumbercatch

"What the fuck did you mean, flattered?"

Jamie glances at Roy on the bike behind him. "What?"

"Look where you're fucking going," Roy snaps, and Jamie looks back ahead just in time to dodge someone wheeling a pram. "I said, what the fuck did you mean when you said you were flattered that everyone thought you were gay? Why is that flattering?"

Jamie is confused for a moment that he's bringing this up now, then remembers Roy wasn't in the room for that. Someone must have mentioned it to him. "Always wanted to be gay," he explains.

"Why?"

Jamie shrugs. "Better clothes. Better clubs. Way better hookup apps. Plus, men are dead sexy."

There is a very long silence. Jamie glances back again just to make sure Roy hasn't fallen off the bike.

"You think men are sexy," Roy says flatly. "As in, you would like to have sex with them?"

"Yeah," Jamie sighs. "I think about it all the time."

Another long silence, then: "Have you ever heard the word bisexual?"

"Oh yeah, that's people who get to bang both! The fucking dream, innit. Wish that were me."

The rope around Jamie's waist starts to jerk rhythmically. He looks back to find Roy banging his head against the handlebars of the bike. "I don't—even—get fucking—paid for this," he's mumbling, and that's all Jamie catches before he crashes full-on into a streetlamp.

TED LASSO

↳ Ted Lasso S03E09: La Locker Room Aux Folles

#He broke the circle (insp)