!!WARNING!!!
Don’t try it at home.
Seriously, it tastes horrible. :’)
This was an experiment for my FebBruabba story, Drink.
I needed to know what looks like a tea, smells like a tea, but tastes absolutely awful. (But also believable that someone might have ended up with it.)
So I took some researches on teas in different cultures and mixed them. >:3c
I present you butler Abbacchio’s morning tea recipe
- 7 green cardamom pod
- 5 slices of ginger (or double for hangovers!)
- 6-8 whole cloves
- a cinnamon stick
- 2 teas poons loose leaf black tea
- 7 allspice (or black peppercorns)
- 2 star anise (optional)
- a pinch of cumin (optional)
- 2.5 dl water
- a quarter’s grapefruit’s juice
- a pinch of salt (or a bit more)
The base is Masala Chai, and I came across the idea of grapefruit tea too at some point. But what I consider my crowing achievement was to find the the salty tea from parts of Nepal and Tibet (usually drank with yak milk or butter).
Now here’s my diary of making this tea, trying out if it gave the desired results.
The Experiment
- 6PM: Grind the ingredients in the mortar. Added the water, and cooked it until boiling (and 10 extra minutes for extra bitterness). No grapefruit added at this point.
- Waited a couple of minutes for the beverage to cool, then filtered it into a mug.
- Luckily it smells good so the victims would expect a nice spiced tea - the perfect bait!
- Without grapefruit, only with salt it tastes simply weird (very weird), surprising, just not what you expect from a tea. XD
- With grapefruit added however it’s downright DISGUSTING! It tastes like… puke: warm, salty, bitter - especially if it’s lukewarm. It’s awful!!! Makes you wanna gag and throw up! X’C
- After drinking it (slowly ungh), I feel the coffein/tein to kick in, I see why Leone would use the base for a wake-up drink (was a bad idea to do in the evening pffft). The extra bitter, overcooked black tea is still lingering on my tongue. But luckily the other, salty bits are fading quickly (it’s only THAT bad for a few moments, until you swallow)
- A slight headache is forming, but I think it’s just the strength of this thing.
- Ah, the salty, bitter aftertaste is still here after half an hour. It kinda irritates my throat X’D;
- 7PM: After an hour I decided to end my sufferings, the bitter tea aftertaste still lingered so I ate jam & bread. It was also doing things with my stomach but that could be the ginger: it’s good for digestion.
- 8PM: After 2 hours I still feel the caffeine (which is very unlike of me, usually these things don’t work on me. This thing definitely works pft)
- 4AM: I was finally able to go to sleep. Making this thing in the evening was DEFINITELY a bad idea. :’)