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Sweetest Boy You Know

@andrewmoocow / andrewmoocow.tumblr.com

Andy | July 23 | 23 | Autistic | Just a guy who lives his life the best he can.
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Little Homeworld Life chapter 25: A Temple Divided (originally published on June 12, 2023)

AN: At long last, everything begins coming together in the first part of this two-part finale to Little Homeworld Life. Afterwards, we only have Snake Eyes left to cover before finally closing the door on Steven Universe: Alternate Future. Almost every single plotline we've been setting up throughout the entire series will reach what I hope is a satisfying conclusion here, from Black Rutile's control over the Internet, how the Crystal Gems' actions have consequences, the return of Cinnabar, and many more. I think this might be one of the darkest chapters of the series yet, so hold onto your butts as it all comes crumbling down.

Synopsis: With some new and old allies by her side, Black Rutile begins making plans for her latest revenge on the Crystal Gems by breaking them up using some long-forgotten secrets. Meanwhile, President Eduardo Suarez fights for his life against Black Rutile's human supporters.

Cast:

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball, Ruby, Doc, Navy, Army, Leggy, Mega Ruby

Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate

Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst, Famethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl, The Black Pearl Brigade

Shelby Rabara as Peridot, Squaridot

Jennifer Paz as Lapis, Laz, Zuli, Phoenix Lapis Lazuli

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Erica Luttrell as Sapphire

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper, Dalmatian Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Jon Wurster as Marty

Shanelle Grey as Sally Grove

Casey Robertson as Neil Michaels

John Kassir as Reginald Anderson

Lin-Manuel Miranda as President Eduardo Suarez

Wendie Malick as Vice-President Theresa Maxwell

GZA as Major General Wade Grant

Tim Curry as General Lloyd Waller

Amy Sedaris as Teal Zircon

Martha Higerada as Topaz

Jinkx Monsoon as Emerald, Chest Emerald

Hayley Kiyoko as Morganite

Melissa Fahn as Demantoid, Eyeball Demantoid

Kari Wahlgren as Pyrope

Olivia Olson as Citrine Twins

Avi Roque as Cinnabar

Gina Torres as Andesine

Awkwafina as Kyanite

Allison Janney as Pyrite

Zehra Fazal as Zoisite

Lena Hall as Bloodstone

Jodie Whittaker as Xenotime

Idina Menzel as Amazonite

Halsey as Tanzanite

Mia Barron as Apatite

Sarah Jessica Parker as Dumortierite

Cavetown as Diaspore

Barbara Dunkelman as Amber

Kristen Schaal as Howlite

Christoph Waltz as Francis von Bowling

Featuring Stephanie Beatriz as Arleen Suarzez

Xolo Mariduena as Huey Suarez

Leslie Grace as Riley Suarez

Peter Barto as Secret Service Agent

With Alyson Hannigan as Lavenderine

And May Calamawy as Chrome Chalcedony

--

One lovely summer day in Beach City, the Crystal Gems were getting ready for a party. But it wasn't just any party, they were preparing for Ruby and Sapphire's wedding anniversary party and the anniversary of their professional alliance with the Diamonds. The Gems were hard at work on making sure the party was perfect, but little did they realize that this party would be pooped on very soon.

"Okay Zirconias, just put that banner over to the right!" Pearl ordered the Heaven and Earth Cubic Zirconias to move a banner reading 'HAPPY ANNIVERSARY RUBY AND SAPPHIRE' into her requested position. Unfortunately, the two Cubic Zirconias were far too small to carry it and made it fall down. "Okay, maybe I should've told someone else to do it."

"What do you mean you're on a wedding cake shortage?!" Amethyst complained over the phone to a bakery. "Who in the world could possibly want that many cakes?! Oh, the Royal Family? Yeah, that makes sense. I'll just call someone else. Thanks anyways, choom."

"So, how's the happy couple doing right now?" Bismuth asked Ruby and Sapphire as the red and blue married couple oversaw the preparations.

"We're doing wonderful Bismuth, thank you." Sapphire smiled gently.

"Can you believe it's only been four years since we learned Rose Quartz was Pink Diamond?" Ruby asked. "Sometimes, I feel like it's been even longer. Like, way longer!"

"It does feel that way sometimes with everything we've done since then," Pearl added. "Between going to Homeworld, meeting White Diamond for the first time, starting Era 3, the Demantoid & Pyrope crisis, building Little Homeworld, the Spinel crisis, and fighting Black Rutile, it's just been too much."

"Hey Lapis, how's the weather looking?" Amethyst called to Lapis, who was high in the sky to check the weather.

"Looking pretty good, so far!" Lapis replied. "Though I think a storm might be coming soon." She added, pointing to some faint storm clouds in the distance. "Should we start worrying about that? I mean, can't have bad weather on a wedding anniversary."

"I'm sure it won't matter." Ruby declared. "No silly old storm can keep us down! Right, my laughy Sapphy?"

"Oh Ruby, you dog!" Sapphire laughed as Ruby held her one-eyed wife in her arms and kissed her. However, the storm would unknowingly become the least of their worries. Hidden in the distance, Black Rutile snuck into the beach house with a plastic bag full of Gem shards in her hand, hoping that her enemies were far away enough to not notice her entering.

"This had better work." Black Rutile muttered to herself while opening the door to the bathroom and grabbing the three bottles of the Diamonds' essence from the mirror. "I got a lot riding on these bottles to bolster my forces."

After filling the bathtub with water and pouring the essence in, Black Rutile pulled open the bag and dumped the Gem shards into the tub. She sat at the tub crouching in anticipation, hoping what she heard about how Jasper was resurrected after being shattered by a power-mad Steven was true. Suddenly, she saw a light emerging from the tub. "Yes, it's working!"

Black Rutile watched in excitement as Zoisite's deceased team of Phoenix Lapis Lazuli, Eyeball Demantoid, Chest Emerald, and the Citrine Twins were fully restored to life. "Happy welcome back day, my friends!" she exclaimed. "Allow me to introduce myself, I am Black Rutile! You may remember me for rising to the top of White Diamond's court only to realize how much of it was built on a lie by my Diamond's demented sense of humor!"

"I'm sorry, I'm going to need a refresher here since I just came back to life." Phoenix Lapis muttered while getting out of the tub and shaking water out of her hair. "Your Diamond did what now?"

"Listen to me, I shall explain everything along the way." Black Rutile stated as she helped the rest of Zoisite's formerly deceased subordinates out of the bathtub. "Just follow me to this place called Little Homeworld that I'm forced to reside in here on Earth."

"Oh, you bet I'm going to need a heads up." One of the Citrine twins muttered as Black Rutile led the newly revived Gems out of the bathroom and onto the Warp Pad.

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Little Homeworld Life chapter 8: The Krav Maga Gem (originally published on October 3, 2022)

AN: We're getting pretty close to the end of the season here, everyone. Time flew by so fast now that I think about it. Guess that's what happens when you're a twenty-one-year-old college boy who feels like time keeps moving way too fast for his taste. And in addition, consider this a spiritual tie-in to the ever amazing Cobra Kai, and by extension The Karate Kid. Only this is about Krav Maga instead of karate, and there's no rival dojos to contend with, only just one rival that Teal Zircon accidentally gets way in over her head against. Now, if we have nothing else to discuss, let the challenge begin!

Synopsis: Vice-president Theresa Maxwell teaches Krav Maga to Teal Zircon.

Cast:

Amy Sedaris as Teal Zircon

Wendie Malick as Theresa Maxwell

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl

Jennifer Paz as Lapis

Shelby Rabara as Peridot

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Lin-Manuel Miranda as Eduardo Suarez

GZA as Wade Grant

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Featuring Ralph Macchio as Master Dan

Sean Schemmel as Jotaro Kaminashi

Christopher Sabat as Seto Itadori

Stephanie Sheh as Ujibe

Tony Oliver as Spiker

Kaiji Tang as Larry

Hilary Swank as Young Theresa Maxwell

And William Zabka as Tourist

--

"You cannot defeat me, Jotaro Kaminashi!" the Iron Blazer Seto Itadori exclaimed as he and his rival Jotaro Kaminashi faced off in an epic martial arts tournament. "My weather magic level is over 9000!"

"It's true, you may have great power, but none compared to the power of friendship!" Jotaro replied bravely. "If it weren't for all of my friends that helped me get to this point, like Ujibe, Spiker, and Larry, I wouldn't be standing here today as your fierce opponent!"

"We love you, Jotaro!" Jotaro's primary female companion and love interest Ujibe cried out, her assets jiggling a little too much in her skimpy outfit.

"We're with you all the way!" Jotaro's childhood best friend Spiker added.

"You got this." Jotaro's incredibly manly mentor Larry said tersely with a thumbs up.

"Their love for me shall give me my strength!" Jotaro cried happily as he was bathed in a golden-brown aura. "Behold, my ultimate technique!"

"Is that so?" Seto smirked arrogantly as he powered up with an emerald-green aura. "Then check out my technique!"

"AUTUMN LEAVES BREATHING STYLE: RAKE FLECHETTE!" Jotaro screamed as the two rivals charged at each other before Jotaro launched a barrage of light construct knives.

"SPRING BREEZE OVERDRIVE: BUTTERFLY METAMORPHOSIS!" Seto bellowed as he formed a barrier around himself like a cocoon that broke apart to give him radiant butterfly wings.

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