amwritingmeta reblogged
amwritingmeta reblogged
Thanks.
#emotions#nothing but emotions#flowing through my heart#god I love watching them being this#tense and awkward and all this#bottling up must come to a head#(get your head out of the gutter!)#(but also aw yiss)#and that head should be#(stop it)#all about TRUTH#finally#open communication#but#I'm curious to see what we get because#drowning#didn't give us much by way of foundation for any spec#like yes they're by themselves#but each time they seemed doom-y gloom-y af#so not exactly jumping for the joys#which to me signals they're not quite#done with the whole growing pains thing...#aw we shall see#omg WE SHALL SEE SOON!!#gah!#also this was a beautiful beautiful moment and I'll#always love the start of S15 for it's tense beautiful moments!!
14x14: Dean and Cas and Questioning the Status Quo
Note: I found this in drafts and I believe I chopped it into smaller pieces, but I thought I’d post the whole long thing because it actually ties back to the lack of communication currently happening in S15 and the need to shake up the status quo. By, you know, someone actually speaking words. And the other, you know, actually listening. :)
Let’s take a closer look at this, because it warrants a closer look, or so I’d like to argue: these two idiots are (and Sam too but Dean and Cas more prominently so in this ep) locked in a status quo that is informed by Dean’s inability to stop believing that what he wants is something he can’t have.
Know what I mean?
Now, I think the dance around this fact in 14x14 is quite elegant, way I see it, and though what exactly the gorgon represents is up for interpretation, the simple facts are:
- Noah the gorgon in and of himself is a snake symbol, and per the ouroboros of the title, the snake symbolism in 14x14 might be leaning towards renewal, rebirth and a conjoining of opposites rather than, you know, the snake that brought knowledge to mankind and helped us rebel........ Yeah, kinda good either way you look at it, no?
- Noah also Biblically brought the flood, which is a mighty symbol of rebirth, so he’s this double-edged sword where both edges spell renewal
- Noah looks at you, assesses you and sees the truth of you, established with the truck driver, his note to Dean and with Jack - a bit of a narrative tie to Michael in 14x01, who blasted onto the scene reading the truth of people’s motivations left and right, and subtle foreshadowing of how Michael will shed Dean and go looking for a new skin *shudder’
- Noah enjoys both men and women (yes indeed bisexual symbol and nope I am not the first to point this out of course)
That’s the basic makeup of Noah’s demi-god character, yeah?
Now a bit of a look at the interaction we have in the episode between Dean and Cas. (I have a very strong urge to refer to them as nothing but the two idiots for the rest of this post but) (I shall not)
1. Invisible Cas (and Jack)
It’s rather striking. The first image we get of Sam and Dean breaking through that door together, and alone, only for a mirror moment to come barely a minute later of them doing the exact same thing, only now Cas (and yes, Jack) is stepping through the door with them. *goosebumps all over*
What does it mean? Could mean a host of things. To me?
Well, Noah can’t see angels. Right? Fair enough, he can’t see either Cas or Jack so it’s not like Cas is special here, not really, but what does Noah represent? I talked briefly in an ask about whether he’s representative of toxic masculinity and how I don’t think he is.
He’s submitting to his fate, isn’t he? He’d rather not, but for survival’s sake, he doesn’t really have a choice. He’s performing ritualistic killings because that’s what’s expected of him. He’s not taking any real pleasure from it. Not very toxic, especially when compared to Michael the Dick Archangel, who breaks his promise to Rowena and slaughters the innocent’s of the bunker without mercy.
I would say Noah is more likely to be representative of suppression/repression, predominantly suppression in Dean, because oh, man, is Dean tying himself in very knowing knots this episode, and predominantly repression in Cas and Jack, which is why it makes enormous sense to me that he cannot see them.
You see, where Dean is completely aware of his emotions and is actively and consciously suppressing them - which is so fucking unhealthy - Cas and Jack are both shown, throughout the episode, to be unaware of how deeply their unconscious repression runs. I’ll talk about Jack in a separate post, but oh god. It’s lovely.
Sidenote
Suppression is a psychological term for when we consciously push down unwanted thoughts or urges. Used healthily this is where self-control lies, but when an unwanted emotion or urge is ignored out of fear, this suppression tactic can turn into a pattern of behaviour that may lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms (like drinking, casual sex, violent outbursts, addiction to danger etc) *side eye Dean Winchester* and irrational behaviour and lack of self-control due to lack of self-awareness.
Repression is a psychological term for when we push down unwanted thoughts, urges or very often memories into our unconscious, where our conscious mind is protected from having to deal with these particulars, because our conscious mind is kept wholly unaware that these particulars are a part of us. However, these repressed thoughts, urges or memories will push to be recognised, because anything we try to simply forget, that is deeply affecting, will never stay forgotten, and being unable to confront these buried thoughts, urges or memories may result in unhealthy outlets, such as the coping mechanisms and irrational behaviour mentioned above.
(long af)
amwritingmeta reblogged
I think it’s so important for Castiel’s development that even after Dean threatened to cut him out of his life that Cas kept talking.
He stood up for himself in the face of Dean’s anger and gave one of the most emotionally vulnerable speeches ever.
It feels like Cas has had more significant dialogue all around in these last several episodes than he’s had for seasons. His sense of worth has been so dependent until now on what he could do for the Winchesters and not on what he could say or what comfort he could bring. He’s had no sense that he could possibly be a source of emotional support until he met Jack.
It’s yet to be seen if what Cas could provide Jack over the past weeks will be enough to save Jack, but being there for Jack certainly changed Castiel.
So last night, he kept talking.
I was blown away by this too. I lowkey hoped that the scene might result in Cas (or Sam) calling Dean out for, you know, being unfair, but there’s really no point to that when Dean’s in that mood anyway (and it was always Sam who needed to do it and he did it a mere few scenes later so all is good) and what Cas did, speaking honestly about his feelings and, especially, his motivations, was much more important for him, which is, yeah. Wow.
I still feel that there are words and actions being held back. I don’t know if you reacted to it the way I did, but Sam holding Cas back from speaking to Dean (fair enough) reminded me of Dean holding Cas back from speaking to Sam in 14x08. There’s still this sort of divide there, to me, where I kind of wish Cas would just shake that hand off and follow that gut instinct that made him move in the first place.
Anyway, mostly just wanted to nod and agree. Cas and Dean’s communication this season, apart from the reunion scene which was basically all done through body language, has been much more open than we’ve seen in years, even with Dean’s skulduggery about the damn Mal’ak box. And Cas has felt more comfortable at the bunker, clearly considering it his home and the people there his family ever since first giving Jack the speech about family in 14x01, yeah?
He’s come so very far! So happy for him!
I agree! I think it was really important that Cas being the first to voice his regret opened the lines of communication between Sam and Dean. Cas was also the one to tell Dean about the weirdness in Arkansas in the Pleasantville episode (title is escaping me) and that while it could be argued that holding back his suspicions about Jack caused Mary’s death (did it really?) his communication now is opening doors everywhere. And last week, his whole plot was about opening lines of communication with God. It’s really neat!
Oh so true, I didn’t even think of the God communicator role he assigned himself! :P Cas has been speaking a lot of truths this season, apart from the biggest truth, which is that he’s made a deal for his happiness and so can’t ever be happy and that’s the way the cookie crumbles.
Other than that, though, he’s been very open with Jack, and I do so agree it does feel like this has changed him, and like it’s helped him be more direct with Dean as well. I mean, we’ve gotten more scenes between them where they’ve been in earnest conversation (whatever the tense subtext has been) than we’ve gotten in a long time. *happy dance* Right? Cas asking Dean about his state of mind at the El Sabroso like be still my heart.
Anyway, keep peeling it back, Cas.
I do find it rather disturbing that Cas’ speech when it came to his view on Jack this episode was so very defeatist, though. Cas talking about his faith in Jack in the past tense is just disturbing to me. So quick to judge, really, Cas? But then it does seem like the possible culmination of the theme of judgement that was set up with Michael at the start of the season, and if so, then hopefully all three of these darling men of ours will be called out on it and there will be consequences for misjudging Jack. I really hope so! Eye-opening consequences making them really see the need for open communication.
Please and thank you. :)
HECK YEAH to all of this, but especially the observation that cas was very honest and emotionally present in a way that gives me hope that he’s finally realizing that running away to fix things on his own isn’t what family does. i wonder if he will purposefully tell dean/tfw about his empty deal not because it’s a plot necessity or because jack spills the beans, but rather because he realizes it’s the right thing to do. openness and honesty ftw!
Wouldn’t that be something? Could it be that he realises that “fixing it” is what Jack is trying so desperately to do to the best of his ability and witnessing this behaviour first hand in Jack and realising he’s responsible for putting it there is what finally opens Cas’ eyes to it? *one can hope*
amwritingmeta reblogged
I think it’s so important for Castiel’s development that even after Dean threatened to cut him out of his life that Cas kept talking.
He stood up for himself in the face of Dean’s anger and gave one of the most emotionally vulnerable speeches ever.
It feels like Cas has had more significant dialogue all around in these last several episodes than he’s had for seasons. His sense of worth has been so dependent until now on what he could do for the Winchesters and not on what he could say or what comfort he could bring. He’s had no sense that he could possibly be a source of emotional support until he met Jack.
It’s yet to be seen if what Cas could provide Jack over the past weeks will be enough to save Jack, but being there for Jack certainly changed Castiel.
So last night, he kept talking.
I was blown away by this too. I lowkey hoped that the scene might result in Cas (or Sam) calling Dean out for, you know, being unfair, but there’s really no point to that when Dean’s in that mood anyway (and it was always Sam who needed to do it and he did it a mere few scenes later so all is good) and what Cas did, speaking honestly about his feelings and, especially, his motivations, was much more important for him, which is, yeah. Wow.
I still feel that there are words and actions being held back. I don’t know if you reacted to it the way I did, but Sam holding Cas back from speaking to Dean (fair enough) reminded me of Dean holding Cas back from speaking to Sam in 14x08. There’s still this sort of divide there, to me, where I kind of wish Cas would just shake that hand off and follow that gut instinct that made him move in the first place.
Anyway, mostly just wanted to nod and agree. Cas and Dean’s communication this season, apart from the reunion scene which was basically all done through body language, has been much more open than we’ve seen in years, even with Dean’s skulduggery about the damn Mal’ak box. And Cas has felt more comfortable at the bunker, clearly considering it his home and the people there his family ever since first giving Jack the speech about family in 14x01, yeah?
He’s come so very far! So happy for him!
I agree! I think it was really important that Cas being the first to voice his regret opened the lines of communication between Sam and Dean. Cas was also the one to tell Dean about the weirdness in Arkansas in the Pleasantville episode (title is escaping me) and that while it could be argued that holding back his suspicions about Jack caused Mary’s death (did it really?) his communication now is opening doors everywhere. And last week, his whole plot was about opening lines of communication with God. It’s really neat!
Oh so true, I didn’t even think of the God communicator role he assigned himself! :P Cas has been speaking a lot of truths this season, apart from the biggest truth, which is that he’s made a deal for his happiness and so can’t ever be happy and that’s the way the cookie crumbles.
Other than that, though, he’s been very open with Jack, and I do so agree it does feel like this has changed him, and like it’s helped him be more direct with Dean as well. I mean, we’ve gotten more scenes between them where they’ve been in earnest conversation (whatever the tense subtext has been) than we’ve gotten in a long time. *happy dance* Right? Cas asking Dean about his state of mind at the El Sabroso like be still my heart.
Anyway, keep peeling it back, Cas.
I do find it rather disturbing that Cas’ speech when it came to his view on Jack this episode was so very defeatist, though. Cas talking about his faith in Jack in the past tense is just disturbing to me. So quick to judge, really, Cas? But then it does seem like the possible culmination of the theme of judgement that was set up with Michael at the start of the season, and if so, then hopefully all three of these darling men of ours will be called out on it and there will be consequences for misjudging Jack. I really hope so! Eye-opening consequences making them really see the need for open communication.
Please and thank you. :)
14x18: TFW 2.0 In Fragments
So I really enjoyed this episode (who didn’t) but what I liked the most was the frustration it put in my chest, because I would like to think that this frustration is meant to be there.
These men already talk of Jack as though he’s a lost cause. As though he was good when he had a soul and now he’s gone bad because he lost it. None of them seeing their own prejudiced judgement, none of them stopping to question if this is the actual truth or just the truth as they perceive it.
It’s infuriating. *and gorgeously so*
It’s gorgeously so because I hope the huge mistake they seem set to make in the next episode will give them some real perspective and slap some sense into them. Things are not black and white. Things are not good or evil.
What makes a monster, truly? Truly?
That’s what I’d like to talk about here, actually. In a sense. Because I hope this episode helps lay the groundwork for the emotional payoff that might not come our way next episode, but that might come our way in the finale.
When there has been some sense-slapping going on.
So Jack. Jack as mirror. Actually, Jack is really the fragmentation of TFW in this episode, his actions driven by the lessons he’s learned from his father figures and, even though he’s not outright asking himself WWWD, he’s still acting accordingly.
Fragment 1: Sam and Running Away
Sam’s statement about how he handled the deaths of Maggie and the rest of the hunters, where he just left Jack with Cas and ran away from it all, ties in with how Jack tries to flee, tries to frantically find sanctuary and hide himself away from the absolutely horrifying deed he’s committed, but he finds himself right back where it happened. But as Sam has realised, you can’t outrun your mistakes. They’ll always resurface in worse ways than before, because burying your emotions results in what? Well, your Shadow popping up for a visit. Telling you all the lies about yourself you already believe are true. Hitting all those insecurity and self-loathing buttons. Not pretty or pleasant.
Fragment 2: Dean and Bringing Mary Back
Dean’s first thought is to fight and get back what’s been lost. So they’ll turn to Rowena and her Book of the Damned. Rowena will know what to do. What’s Jack’s first thought? Resurracting Mary. And so he goes to Rowena. Perfectly mirroring Dean’s thought pattern because Jack has learned from the best that when someone you love die, you do whatever it takes to get them back.
Fragment 3: Cas and Fixing Things
Cas tells Dean and Sam that the reason he left and went to try and find someone who might be able to help get Jack’s soul back, was because he was scared and he felt responsible and so he wanted to go and find a way to fix it. The idea of fixing it is tied to Jack’s motivation for resurrecting Mary as well. He has to fix the mistake he’s made.
So...
So even though these three men don’t seem to realise it, their good influence is all the motivation Jack is working under this episode. Unfortunately, their suspicion and mistrust is where Jack’s efforts land, because that’s where TFW are at for the entire episode and so the bad is bound to blend with the good.
Jack is neither monster nor man at this point, so he truly doesn’t deserve to be judged and hunted, no matter the horrific deed he committed. Mary is at peace. Truly. It was a terrible accident. Jack needs to learn how to control his emotions (guess who else needs that more than anyone on this damn planet) (mh) (Dean Winchester) but he is not a monster.
Hopefully the established good will, as mentioned, be a part of what opens the eyes of Sam, Dean and Cas and allow them to see the actual truth: that Jack is a lost, scared, alone nephilim kid, who needs a very steady hand, one that none of them have actually provided for him, because they don’t quite know how.
So they need to reach a point where they understand what they have to do.
Which is be the sort of parental figures a kid can rely on to always tell the truth. Always. Because trust is the most important thing in any relationship and especially between a parent and a child.
Please, let this situation push these men into a position where they understand the necessity for open communication, where honesty builds trust. They’ll all reap the damn benefits. Amen. Cas is seeing the light, I think. His honesty this episode, as well as Sam’s gentle disagreement with Dean and Dean’s relenting into agreeing with Sam’s disagreement are all first steps towards this type of communication happening with less friction. *fingers crossed*
amwritingmeta reblogged
Have you ever seen a horror movie? Like that.
H.o.n.e.s.t.y.
The basis of open communication.
*and I jizz in my pants*
amwritingmeta reblogged
Except I used to belong to a much better club. And now I’m powerless. I’m hapless, I’m hopeless. I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence, right? It’s the end, baby. That’s what decadence is for.
#I do love#The End#but I love it because of the mirror it holds up#it tells us what will happen if TFW do not assemble#this is what happens to the world#when TFW are pulled apart#when the brothers codependency isn't organically resolved#but instead they're forced apart#because they are each other's weakness#and they are better together#this is why I feel so strongly#with all of the narrative in S12 pulling towards#open communication#honesty#and team work#that this is where S13 will pick up#that we will get our boys#working together#around the common cause that is#Jack the Nephilim#pretty please dabb
amwritingmeta reblogged
Yeah. Riddle you that, Dean Winchester. (Cas be like whatever) (which makes the riddling that much harder doesn’t it?) (yes yes it does) (because you’d like him to like you) (but you know he’s all like whatever) (frustrating huh?)
amwritingmeta reblogged
Favorite character meme ↳ 5 / 7 scenes
Sam looks like he’s plotting The Great Intervention of 2017 and I believe it’s started a while back, too. A room with one door and one key that goes in that door and these two asshats locked in that room until they learn to communicate openly about their feelings. You know, instead of this overly sexually frustrated, I-don’t-want-you-to-know-how-attracted-I-am-to-you-in-that-getup-so-I’m-going-to-put-you-down (okay that’s mostly Dean really), you’re-confusing-the-hell-out-of-me-with-your-mixed-signals (mostly Cas to Dean really) LACK OF COMMUNICATION they’ve got going here. Oh, Sam, I do believe your time is coming. And won’t it be glorious?