amwritingmeta reblogged
5x22 -->
15x18 -->
I always wondered, ever since I took that burden, that curse, I wondered what it could be. What my true happiness could even look like. I never found an answer, because the one thing I want, it’s something I know I can’t have. But I think I know… I think I know now, happiness isn’t in the having, it’s in just being. It’s in just saying it. I know how you see yourself, Dean. You see yourself the same way our enemies see you: you’re destructive and you’re angry, you’re broken—you’re daddy’s blunt instrument. And you think that hate and anger, that’s… that’s what drives you, that’s who you are… It’s not. And everyone who knows you sees it. Everything you have ever done—the good and the bad—you have done for love. You raised your little brother for love, you fought for this whole world for love. That is who you are. You’re the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. You know, ever since we met -- ever since I pulled you out of Hell -- knowing you has changed me. Because you cared—I cared. I cared about you... I cared about Sam, I cared about Jack. But I cared about the whole world because of you. You changed me, Dean. Why does this sound like a goodbye? Because it is. …I love you.
#happy now??#sorrynotsorry#also don't even think for a second#that I believe this is how their last goodbye should play out#or that I see this is the narrative delivering what dean has wanted#or needed from cas in the shape of an actual goodbye#nope#it's just beautiful#because what dean needs to know#what he needs to understand#FINALLY#is that cas has never left on a whim#he's never up and left without saying anything#because he DOESN'T care#he cares#he always has#ever since the moment he pulled dean out of hell#cas just told dean that#now all dean needs to do is accept it as truth#oh come back cas#you know you wanna
amwritingmeta reblogged
Thanks.
#emotions#nothing but emotions#flowing through my heart#god I love watching them being this#tense and awkward and all this#bottling up must come to a head#(get your head out of the gutter!)#(but also aw yiss)#and that head should be#(stop it)#all about TRUTH#finally#open communication#but#I'm curious to see what we get because#drowning#didn't give us much by way of foundation for any spec#like yes they're by themselves#but each time they seemed doom-y gloom-y af#so not exactly jumping for the joys#which to me signals they're not quite#done with the whole growing pains thing...#aw we shall see#omg WE SHALL SEE SOON!!#gah!#also this was a beautiful beautiful moment and I'll#always love the start of S15 for it's tense beautiful moments!!
amwritingmeta reblogged
12x17/15x07
#the dean moment of s12 was actually#a mirror moment of what cas went through#when waiting to hear back from dean who was held#imprisoned by the government after the whole#Lucifer possessing the US president debacle#but that said#they've both gone through a lot in terms of#failing communication and#worrying about the other#they've gone through a LOT#and hopefully with purgatory that will finally#FINALLY#take a turn for the bettering#*fingers crossed*
amwritingmeta reblogged
Dean Winchester in every Supernatural episode
↳ 14x19 - Jack in the Box: “I want Zeppelin to get back together. But what I need…what we need is to stop Jack. Big difference.”
#he wants tfw 2.0 to be ok#but what he wants doesn’t matter#when you look at the big picture#ironic how if he’d just opened up and#let go of his anger and his fear#and listened to cas rather than shut him out#rather than leaning on that need for control#and that inability to trust#others and himself#then he could’ve reached through to Jack#if dean had just been able to TRUST#and I think that’s what he’s about to learn#finally#F I N A L L Y
amwritingmeta reblogged
“They were never in fact, homeless.”
- Chuck
#dean spent his childhood#trying to make every new crappy motel room#feel like home#but when he was handed the keys to baby#he felt like he'd been handed the keys to a safe place#finally#and now he got to choose where to drive and where to park and#that sense of freedom and control must've been damn near overwhelming#god I love dean winchester#I love him with all of my heart
amwritingmeta reblogged
too much heart was always castiel's problem
#and daring to admit his deep deep longing#for love is Dean’s biggest internal obstacle#once he dares to admit to himself#that what he wants is#love and the stability and hope and trust that comes with it#he’ll see there’s no need to dress himself in that#toxic masculinity armour#he’ll be free#finally#to embrace his true identity#the guy he’s always been all along#it’s not about change#it’s about opening up to the truth#and that very same thing goes for#cas#and for sam too
amwritingmeta reblogged
#I really love the moment that comes after this#when dean is getting in the car all giddy that#he managed to ground cas and have him#ride in the impala with them#and sure you could look at that from the perspective#of dean wanting to have the#upper hand in the situation for once#but you can also see it as dean#truly wanting cas with them and finally#FINALLY#cas is submitting#giving himself over wholly to the HUMAN way of doing things#well of course he uses his powers when needed but#so do dean and sam if you put it in the context of skill#good god s8#deancas#all the destiel#for queue
amwritingmeta reblogged
13x12//Various & Sundry Villians
We’re finally getting a glimpse into Sam’s head and I feel so blessed
This whole scene made my heart tremble.