SHERYL LEE RALPH accepts her award for Best Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series at the 28th Annual Critics Choice Awards (January 15, 2023)

coworker asks if i like harry potter and i have to make a disco elysium skill check to come up with a response

CIS COWORKER — Hey you seem really into wizards and stuff, I bet you love Harry Potter :)

EMPATHY — He’s just trying to be polite and make conversation. He doesn’t know about JK Rowling’s opinions on trans people. Let’s politely change the subject.

COMPOSURE [Trivial: Failure] — “Kill yourself.”

for me internet friendships are “we don’t talk all the time but I see you’re online and it makes me happy” and I really hope it’s like that for everyone

(via @freenarnian )

Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me.

I know there is a lot of discourse (tm) around this right now but listen to me

sometimes you do just have to lie to children.

If, when my toddler is, you know, toddling around saying “mama? Big ball?”

If I were lean down and say “unfortunately the big beach ball for some reason fills you with such an unadulterated rage that is beyond human comprehension that you scream until you pass out, so mama had to remove the beach ball from the premises until you can better regulate your emotions” she would simply stare at me like I had 3 heads full of equal betrayal.

So, for now, instead “big ball went night night!”

Please understand when I say “removed the ball from the premises” I mean I popped it in a fit of exhausted confusion. I murdered the beach ball.

See I’ve lied to you all too and it was better this way.

you can’t just leave this in the tags etc.

You can’t be funnier then me on my own posts, I’m in tears from laughter

[ID: tags: "#that wasn't a lie though the big ball did go night night #it went to the great night night that awaits us all" /end ID]

A 22 yr old in my org got drunk tuesday night and kinda shit on the fact that I'm running a community cleanup for our chapter. Said something along the lines of "i didn't join up to pick trash." Which really bothers me and it took me a while to figure out why. The whole point of the community cleanup is that we're returning to the neighborhoods where we knocked doors for A4 to help clean up their streets and provide material improvement for free in an effort to build inroads with those neighbors.

Like... if your socialism doesn't include picking uo trash, I'm guessing it also doesn't include doing the dishes, babysitting, or anything else that is important but not prestigious. Idk man, fuck off with that shit. You'll pick up trash and you'll like it until you understand why picking up trash isn't anyone's job but your own. I hate that attitude. If helping and doing activism was always fun and visible and impressive, everyone you know would already be doing it.

Hey, the ACLU is getting people to send letters to your Reps to have Congress pass the No Kings Act.

This act would make constitutional amendments to ensure that even sitting presidents are held liable for their actions. That NOBODY is above the law.

Their goal is 150k messages sent and at the time of writing this they're about 2.1k off from that goal!

ACLU gives you a prefilled message that you can edit to send to make the process easier, and will send it out for you.

This only takes a few minutes!

Not unreality, not a joke: I have never posted such a thing before here but- Please do this one for whatever good it might result in.

we won

peace and love on my dash this afternoon

dash is dead im teleporting to the past

https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard?max_post_id=606474489540042752

2016 dash here

2014 dash

2012 dash

2010 dash

BEFORE YOU CLICK A LINK!

Reblog this post :) Especially if you’re on mobile, you’ll lose the post if you click the link without thinking. Take a note from your elders before you

This is actually really fun!

Only valid form of locker room talk. Anyone who says someone saying bigoted shit is "just locker room talk" is lying and they should be dragged for it.

(They’re a coxswain for a men’s rowing team and coxswains can be of any gender, provided they don’t weigh much.)

modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

this isn't going to happen but it WOULD be very funny

the prison abolition leaving my body when it's funny

I don't care if it's the best TV show of all time. I cannot be tricked into consuming a cartoon about league of legends.

It’s loosely inspired by league of legends.

Imagine Spiderverse style animation with a plot about class differences, civil war, when it’s okay to abandon morals for the greater good, and how much evil someone can do before they’re not family anymore. Then throw in two gay situationships and the greatest soundtrack you’ve ever heard.

If that’s not your thing, that’s cool. Don’t disregard it just cause it’s league of legends tho.

YOU CANNOT TRICK ME

"We need more complex female characters" you guys can't even handle Chappell Roan, Real Life Woman with Boundaries

"use chatgpt" that's the devil talking. buy four caffeinated drinks and pull an all nighter. this is the way.

i may lose 5% for a late submission, but at least no one can deny that i wrote it with my own tits i mean brain