Oh, Gymternet. You amuse me.

So this morning, I made a post that was equal parts social experiment and live action crackfic, claiming Bruno Grandi had called for the removal of the uneven bars from the women’s program in the aftermath of this year’s Worlds. I included a source link that led directly to a RickRoll, which I thought would be enough to get the point across that I was joking, but of course this being Tumblr, a lot of people didn’t bother to check it. Their outrage led to some rather amusing (and sometimes telling) responses and I’d like to reproduce some class examples for you here.

The Ones In Denial

“Is this real”

“I…what??”

“I’m speechless… Wtf is this?”

“Can someone come out and say this is a parody? Please.” (Luckily for you, yes, it was.)

They realized this seemed a little too ridiculous even for Grandi, but just couldn’t make themselves push the button to check.

The Ones Who Were Angry

“as a bars specialist this offends me greatly and I am speechless”

“-Find better judges

-Change CoP rules regarding the apparatus

-Find better judges

-Find better judges

Find better FUCKIN JUDGES

any of these would be better than to get rid of them. i just… what. this is ridiculous.”

So appalled by what they read, they threw fact-checking to the wayside because THIS REQUIRES ACTION, IMMEDIATELY.

Anger Pt. 2: The Bruno Haters

“What the fuck is actually wrong with this man“

“So this is how stupid the people in charge are? Wow.“

“Does stoica give bruno the money he doesnt give to foreign coaches so bruno can spill bullshit all over the place”

Honestly, I feel your pain. This guy is an idiot and I’m honestly not sure I’d put this past him, but luckily for us he’s not actually suggesting it. YET.

The Ones That Skipped Straight To Acceptance

“Romania should be happy“

“*ROLLS EYES HARDER THAN I’VE EVER HAVE IN MY WHOLE LIFE*🙄🙄🙄”

“Why are so many countries having such issues with the uneven bars?   They’ve been part of the sport for decades, why are modern gymnasts somehow “deficient” but gymnasts of the past weren’t?”

“Really? Get rid of bars? Hahaha. If that’s the case Russia and China won’t see another team podium LOL”

Honestly, at this point the man has done so much damage that we’ve just decided to roll over and accept whatever else happens, apparently. I’m fairly upset by the fact that this is probably the largest category of people that didn’t cotton on. Who hurt you, gymternet? (Oh, right. Bruno.) Oddly, even though we saw some depression as well, there was no bargaining going on.

The Ones Who Were Unclear On The Concept of a RickRoll

“I want the link”

“(?) i wanna read the letter lol ! someone link me.”

There were a few others more clearly not getting the joke that have since been removed as well.

I honestly don’t know what to say other than… RickRolling has been around for nearly a decade and had a resurgence on Tumblr just this past year; if you don’t know what it is by now… ???????

In Conclusion

Thank you for your time and have a good evening.

Bruno Grandi: “It is time for the uneven bars to be eliminated”

BRUNO has done it again, it seems. The annual post-Worlds Steaming Crock of Bullshit® is finally here, and I quote:

The letter also mentions the four way tie for gold in the bar final, calling it “a joke” and “a disgrace to the dignity of our sport”. Grandi makes it clear that he believes the only solution is to completely remove uneven bars from the WAG program, leaving the sport to only be composed of vault, beam and floor. Curiously, there was no commentary along the same lines regarding MAG’s similar problems with pommel horse.

Other topics discussed include the AOGC/Belarus situation - in which Grandi takes credit for suggesting the “ingenious and creative solution” for Belarus’ problem to Nelli Kim during FIG staff meetings last year - and the “ongoing problem” of difficulty outweighing execution (despite the fact that in almost every final in both MAG and WAG this year, as last year, the top 3 E scores were either on the podium or missing it by mere hundredths of a point), renewing his ridiculous demand that the D score count for half its current value in the next redraft of the COP.

I am absolutely at a loss for words. You can read the whole thing here- but beware, you may get even more table-flippingly angry than you usually do when this idiot puts pen to paper.

*ROLLS EYES HARDER THAN I’VE EVER DONE IN MY WHOLE LIFE*🙄🙄🙄

U.g.h.

ohhh boyyy

…This doesn’t even make sense

there’s a reason why the Chinese gymternet calls the FIG PIG.