aiitori reblogged
heartsandmagic
Cat doesn’t know what to do with the butterfly that flew on its paw.
waywardandwanderlust
I can’t breathe I’m laughing too hard
aiitori reblogged
"loki is misunderstood"
yes by you
aiitori reblogged
thanosisabutt-deactivated201608
Steve Rogers says a witty one liner, but doesn’t have a plane to jump out of. He begins to sweat nervously as he did not plan for this.
aiitori reblogged
The Real World: Avengers Tower
Interviewer: So what's it like living with Tony?
Bruce: When I moved in, he insisted on funding all of my research. Except, you know, ever since The Incident, all my work's been theoretical. It's not actually that expensive. I've started just spending all the extra on fruit pies, just to see if he was keeping track. He isn't. There are a lot of unused rooms in this building, and at least three of them are stacked floor to ceiling with fruit pies. He hasn't said a word.
Natasha: It turned out Pepper and I both speak French. Tony doesn't. Now, whenever he walks in, we just start whispering in French and giggling. Half the time we're just exchanging recipes. He pretends not to be eavesdropping, but the other day I caught him asking JARVIS what 'des oeufs' meant.
Clint: I bought this big bag of little plastic flies, right? And whenever he's not paying attention, I throw them into his drink. Half the time he doesn't even notice and just drinks the damn things, but the other half? He starts checking all the house filtration systems, the exterminators, the works. He can't figure out where all these flies are coming from. He's fumigated three times in the last month.
Thor: I attempted to provide assistance with a project, but Stark assured me that it was 'very technical', and that I would not understand the intricacies. I can see why he would think so, as I am a mere Prince of Asgard, taught such basic engineering when I was a child and his ancestors could not yet walk. It has been five weeks, and he still has not corrected the misaligned condenser coil causing the problem.
Steve: I don't know what Howard taught that kid, but he seems to be under the impression that homosexuality was invented in 2000. He keeps leaving magazines and pictures lying around like the sight of two men holding hands is going to give me a heart attack. I don't have the heart to tell him about the Greeks.
Interviewer: So how are things in Avengers Tower?
Tony: How are things? I have no idea. I really don't. There's some kind of insect infestation in the vents and I think a spy is trying to seduce my girlfriend into moving to France. I tried to prank Captain America with gay porn, but him and Thor just started trying to reverse-engineer workout routines. The other day I went into one of the spare rooms, and I found some kind of one-armed sex hobo sitting on a throne of empty fruit pie boxes. I just walked out and closed the door. I don't even wanna know.
aiitori reblogged
they call him the winter soldier
aiitori reblogged
thats nOT WHAT I MEANT
aiitori reblogged
Sebastian Stan Appreciation - Law & Order : Sheltered 2004
i had this dream where tony was putting red star stickers on clint's face and he was like "see, it's a metaphor" and clint grabbed an arrow and stabbed him and said "see, it's a metaphor. wait no, i'm actually fucking killing you"
aiitori reblogged
actualmenacebuckybarnes
haha are you kidding me
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
Look at Bucky turn around, grin ready on his face, Steve look at the flying car, just bonkers, ain’t it? But no, Steve’s not there.
Immediately, his expression drops. This guy’s on a date, and his best friend steps away from his side for one whole minute and Bucky’s face is all suddenly WORRY and DREAD.
Where’d Steve get himself off to now??
Oh shit, what if he inhales some pollen and dies?????
What if he finds some stairs and falls down them????
STEVE NO STEVE STOP DOING THINGS WHEN I’M NOT THERE STEVE
aiitori reblogged
d’you think the avengers ever play a game where they try to push steve’s buttons and get him all riled up and patriotic?
tony casually throws it into a conversation like “oh yeah I don’t vote” and steve trails off mid-sentence and gapes for a second before he starts in on the importance of the democratic process and how dangerous it can be if citizens give up their say in how the government is run and tony is trying so so hard to keep a straight face
meanwhile bruce is standing in the background timing the speech with his watch because whoever gets the longest rant wins a little trophy that tony made. the current holder of the trophy is clint who managed to convince steve that he doesn’t pay taxes
aiitori reblogged
I’m going back to the circus.