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#shit academia says – @aeolianblues on Tumblr
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aeolianblues

@aeolianblues / aeolianblues.tumblr.com

Amateur writer and cartoonist, trash poetry specialist, musician, punk radio host, computer science student and enthusiast. Muser, hi hello! Museblogging at @sunburnacoustic. Disastrously cooking at @vengefulcooking
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reblogged
thiswilldragon
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athenasdragon

professors who have only interacted with other academics for years: “what do you MEAN you don’t know multi-variable calculus yet??”

professors with small kids: “thank you for not putting the lab equipment in your mouths when I turn my back”

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athenasdragon

Bringing this back to share that one time I slept through part of a zoom meeting with my PhD advisor (who has a toddler) and he told me it was fine, that just meant I was a good sleeper

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eilooxara

Professors who work with graduate students: if you finish the multivariate calculus work this week you can put one (1) piece of lab equipment in your mouth

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that-lesbian-writer

Once had a professor whose previous career was giving educational zoo tours to children, so he’d say stuff like, “now let’s meet our friend, acidic keratin!”

#shit academia says#shit academics say#I'm starting a collection I love these#weird writeups seen around campus#(i know its not a writeup but that is my beloved collection)
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reblogged
crazy-pages
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abluescarfonwaston
(We’re taking a calculus final. The TA is a well-known Lord of the Rings fan, and we’ve had running LotR jokes all semester.)
TA: “Okay, guys, everyone look at me. We’ve been over the rules, but just in case: no notes, pencil your answers in on the scantron sheet, and graphing calculators only – no more ‘can I just used my cell phone’ nonsense.”
Student: “[TA’s name], my calculator batteries just died! What should I do?”
TA: “Here, I’ve got a big box of spares.”
Student: *struggling* “I can’t get this packaging open…”
Student 2: “Here, I’ve got a pocket knife.”
TA: “And I’ve got a pair of scissors if you need them.”
Student 3: *from the back of the room* “OR MY AXE!”
(Everyone starts laughing.)
TA: “The only axes allowed on the exam are in the graph section.”
(Everyone groans.)
TA: “Oh, come on, you’re in a math class. Deal with the math jokes.”
(The professor enters with a stack of exams. With him are two exam proctors.)
Professor: “Tolkien jokes already, [TA’s name]?”
TA: “Hey, I didn’t start it.”
(The professor starts handing stacks of exams to the TA and proctors.)
Professor: “But I’m about to finish it. [TA], take these exams down the left flank. [Proctor 1], follow the desks down the center. [Proctor 2], take your exams right, along the wall.”
(At this point, many of the students have realized where this is going: Theoden’s lines from ‘Return of the King.’)
Professor: “Forth, and fear no problems! Solve! Solve, students of calculus! Points shall be taken, scores shall be splintered! A pencil day! A red-ink day! Until three thirty!”
(The professor pulls out a pencil, holding it out like a sword, and runs down the first row holding it out. Students hold up their pencils, hitting his as he passes.)
Professor: “Solve now! Solve now! Solve to good grades and the class ending! MAAATH!”
Entire Class: “MAAATH!”
Professor: “MAAAAATH!”
Entire Class: “MAAAAAATH!”
Professor: “Forth, exam-takers!”
(The entire class rises to their feet and gives him a standing ovation. A week later, we get an email from the professor.)
Professor: *at the end of the email* “PS: I appreciate all of you who wrote in their evaluations that I was the one professor to rule them all, but the best one yet was the student who called me ‘Mathrandir.’”
#shit academics say#shit academics do#weird writeups seen around campus#shit academia says#university
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[ID: a figure in a textbook that has curved arrows to look like vectors in a field. The figure caption reads, "Is this a vector field? No. It's a picture" /end]

#shit academics say#shit academia says#weird writeups seen around campus#< this is a tag I used to maintain for some weird-ass shit I used to see written around campus... I'm still quite fond of the tag though#I use it less often#well! now that I'm back on campus maybe I'll use it more!#taken from reddit this one#math memes#maths memes#physics memes#FOR ME IT'S THE NO. FULL STOP. Not a comma; no. full stop.#stem#science memes#scienceblr? idk what people use#university#academia#student#college#stem memes
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From LiveScience, “Maybe you are on someone's crap list. That could be a good thing. Fecal transplants — in which doctors inject several teaspoons of a sample of fresh feces into a person's gut via a tube in the nose (yes, teaspoons) — are a rather effective cure for Clostridium difficileinfection (CDI) and related diarrhea-causing bacterial diseases. How doctors stumbled upon the procedure is anyone's guess. The practice is also known by the marginally less gross euphemism fecal bacteriotherapy and is related to probiotics, the infusion of "healthy" bacteria into the gut. Doctors are eyeing this technique to reverse symptoms of Parkinson's disease and diabetes. Much of the research is being conducted down under ... in Australia, that is. Above is an illustration of magnified bacteria.”

I’ll take images I did not need in my head for a million bucks, please

#Science#shit academics say#—but very literally#Weird writeups seen around campus#and in the hallowed journals smh#Life sciences#academia#shit Academia says#stem memes#It’s true though apparently! Ive linked it#Also apparently 3 or more glasses of milk a day can be *worse* for bone health which is#a) gutting; I’m a believer in cereal and milk b) yikes wtf it used to be ‘milk calcium to prevent osteoporosis’ now this??#You can’t fucken win
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Can't believe they developed an entire branch of algorithms study just because they didn't want to admit greedy algorithms are shit
#computer science#greedy algorithms#DON'T DO SHIT#they delved into an entire branch of vector mathematics just to find some justifiable reason to have them live#*we don't need greedy algs*#I'm CS circlejerking sure#there must be some good use for greedy algs **even if its just a special case**#but hey I get to shit on something I have to deal with 25 hours a day#academia#shit academia says#Weird writeups seen around campus#programmer
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