the worm in tham n0phis’ brain

I love the old timey phrase "you forget yourself". bro that was so impolite like do you even know who you are rn

Every summer I forget how much I fucking love spiders I’ve drunk one every day this week

Drinking spiders??!

You put ice cream in a glass and pour soft drink over it. It creates a thick layer of delicious foam on top of a sweet, creamy drink with ice cream in it.

And yes I did attempt to get a picture by googling “Australia spider” like a fucking moron.

I think that’s called a float in the states. Although we usually plop the icecream into the glass after the soda. Similar effect though.

We wouldn’t be able to call it that because the word is way too easy to confuse with a floater, which is a meat pie floating in a bowl of pea soup. It is every bit as delicious as a spider though. I should get some pies and pea soup.

I would like to announce that this is not a standard Australian food, it’s exclusively a South Australian one and the rest of Australia is just as appalled as the rest of the world.

It’s not our fault that the rest of Australia is incorrect about food.

#WE HAVE SPIDERS IN AOTEAROA and they serve CUNT#im gonna steal ice cream from work this weekend and make spiders with it. i will steal the fizzy from work also#i fucking hate my boss 

Living your best life I see

“average person eats 3 spiders a year" factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in South Australia and BADLY misinterpreted our survey question,,

I dislike this implication. They’re very big in Victoria as well.

South Australians are just pompous snobs who claim that they’re the only state with good things, and every bad thing about Australia belongs to the other states.

They are well known for this propaganda in Australia.

SA aren’t pompous snobs just because you are unable to read a post. I guarantee that floaters are not a standard Australian food and are wildly unpopular outside of SA.

SA are pompous snobs but you’re right about the weird food thing

We’re pompous snobs for honest and stupid reasons! We’re proud of out meat pie in pea soup combo!

gonna bust up that old arcade with some friends tonight. were gonna completely fuck it up itll be so funny. gonna destroy that stupid game that was like super rigged. hope i dont get my new sneakers too dirty tho lol!

what the fuck.

a fascinating new addition to tumblr's christmas pantheon

Does anyone have that post where it's like "the woke left have replaced mrs claus with a 5'7 twink named tony tinsel"? It feels vital to this

OH FUCK I FORGOT TONY TINSEL

The 'hyperspecific situations' polls are really once again highlighting that native English speakers tend to forget that 'foreign' doesn't mean 'non-English' or 'non-American'

"Did you watch a foreign language movie in the past three days?" Yeah I watched the foreign movie "The Martian" with foreign actor Matt Damon

Op why would you hide this is the tags

your life is not an optimization problem

as in you'll never achieve the perfect daily routine, sleep schedule, coping mechanisms, mannerisms, fashion sense etc. even after years and years of healing and improvement and self-discovery. you will never be so good at life that you manage to utilize every waking moment. its great to be productive and all but sometimes you'll suck ass. sometimes you'll take eight hours to be done with a twenty minute job. you'll prioritize the wrong thing. you'll sleep for 12 hrs just to avoid being awake. you'll relapse. and you'll relapse again. you'll forget to turn in the assignment. you'll order too little food. life is far too large and complex for you to even experience it completely, much less try to make sense of and control it. you can't. please give up on that and be at peace with the hours you lose. they are not separate from your life.

my sister works in a nursery (in scotland for context) and today a kid came up to her and said "can you put on 'release my wee da'? I want to dance" and my sister was like ?? what the fuck is 'release my wee da', so the kid sang a line of it. turns out, feliz navidad

release my wee da everyone ⛄🎄🎅

Yer da in a field…

this post feels like it’s lost some of its original context because I remember reblogging it in 2012 when I didn’t have a smart phone and smart phone ownership was much lower in general. So being on tumblr on Christmas meant being physically at a computer and being visibly unsocial if not completely removed from any festivities. Now everyone’s on social media every day of the year. A true heritage post really

oh no my pornography is turning into an angst-filled character study

Oh no my angst-filled character study is turning into pornography

fuck off nolan are you going to have six hundred men under my command with only one goal in mind (make it back alive to our homeland)? six hundred men, six hundred miles of open sea? but the problem's not the distance (it's what lies inbetween)?

Odyssey’s having a moment

WELCOME TO SPUDSY'S !!!

now yall know what time it is

The funny thing is i am actually bisexual, bilingual and bipolar

And a bitch

Mean

But are you bipedal?

well, when in loam 🪱

SQUEAK MEGA ART DUMP

squeak is a little cat i used to draw weekly on twitter! she loves chaos and arson, has the ability to travel between dimensions (mostly so i can just draw her with whatever characters i want), and is very smelly

Art by Erin Hanson

The Collectibles: Best of 2024