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#but you know... – @a-darling-thing on Tumblr
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A Darling Thing

@a-darling-thing / a-darling-thing.tumblr.com

Gen X / Neurodivergent / Queer
18+ Sometimes NS4W (tagged - NSFT) Multifandom Blog
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“Our data is The Imitation Game is a superlative film. That your performance is of a caliber that goes beyond some of the best performances that I’ve seen lately. And that you have made the extraordinarily generous gesture of spending an hour here with us. And I theorise from that we are not the only ones who are gonna appreciate you this year. Academy Awards season is coming up and we look forward to seeing you again.” - Annette Insdorf

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ben-locked

That was quite an introduction. And an interviewer who knew what she was doing. 👍

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animatorzee

People will tell you that emotional abuse isn’t real and what you’re dealing with isn’t that big a deal and you’re just exaggerating, but let me tell you something.

If you’ve ever been wary of everyone you know, even people you trust, because you’re expecting them to get angry with you over literally anything, make fun of you, or start making threats, something’s wrong.

If you’ve ever had to plan things in anticipation of a potential tantrum that you fear will be taken out on you, something’s wrong.

If you succumb to someone’s demands because you’re never sure if their threats are empty or legit and you just want to play it on the safe side, something’s wrong.

If you find yourself jumping at smaller noises in anticipation that they’re a warning sign for a tantrum, something’s wrong.

If you hide things - especially things that make you happy - because you’re so afraid that they’ll make fun of you for liking them, scold you for liking something they don’t, take them away, destroy them, or that they’ll defile them and ruin that love you have for them, something’s wrong.

If you find yourself being silent in the face of mild disagreements or thinly-veiled insults, rather than standing up for yourself because you just don’t want to start an argument and make things worse, something’s wrong.

If that very lack of standing up for yourself eventually leads to you never offering your opinion in any sort of discussion out of fear of ridicule or being scolded because that’s what you’re so used to, something’s wrong.

If you end up spending a lot of your time in your room keeping to yourself and keeping any trip outside of your room to an absolute minimum because you don’t want to risk putting one toe out of line and setting off a tantrum, yet you’re also aware that hiding out will also cause an issue and you’re probably just minimizing the risk instead of erasing it entirely, something’s wrong.

If you ever habitually glance outside the window to keep watch for your supposed abuser’s car to return from their work, errand or trip, and then heading to your room or other hiding place to keep out of their way, erasing any obvious signs that you’ve been out and about in the rest of your living space, something’s wrong.

If one of your greatest fantasies involves not a dream career or winning the lottery but instead an escape plan succeeding, something’s wrong.

If you could basically summarize your life as living in constant, subtle fear, Something. Is. Wrong.

Emotional abuse is very, very real, and it has lasting consequences that can affect people’s relationships, their jobs, and their lives all-around.

Don’t you dare tell me it isn’t real.

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reblogged

Listen I’m so torn with fem!Sherlock okay

On one hand I want badass lesbian Sherlock that can rock 6+ inch heels on the regular and wears skirts and pants alike on a regular basis due to what she’ll be doing and has eyeliner so sharp she could cut a bitch with long hair that’s frequently up in messy buns or simply pulled out of the way and who primps and preens and has a similarly intensive body care ritual to the one male Sherlock has (You know that boy is big on self-care even if he doesn’t eat half the time he’s got his priorities fam). Every time a guy looks at her in a certain way she blatantly gags. Intense support for Sally and defense at the ready whenever needed even if they do still don’t like each other. Why is that man crying in the corner. The new kid winked at Sherlock and she verbally ripped out his throat. Everyone just shrugs and turns away.

But on the other hand there’s the Complete Mess lesbian Sherlock. Never any makeup, half the time she’s in pajamas or naked, the other half she’s in suits poking around at bodies and there’s no in between. Her hair is short and chopped off haphazardly since it was getting in her way and she took a pair of scissors to it to get it over with. Stacks of books and papers that she insists on carrying herself while fem!John follows behind and picks up everything she dropped and refuses to acknowledge. Ink stains on half of her clothes. She hasn’t slept in a week. Sherlock is the mold in this teacup for an experiment or were you drinking it and lost it under the mess until now. She doesn’t answer because she honestly isn’t sure anymore. Help her.

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Honestly, my most likely coming out scenario to people like my in-laws will probably be accidental, and born purely of righteous rage.  

Like I live in Texas, where people are voting for idiots like Trump as nothing more than a big middle finger to things like gay marriage becoming legal under Obama’s watch. And I know it’s only a matter of time before someone goes off in my presence, and then I’ll probably get so angry, that I’ll just be like:

“Oh really.  Well I’m bi (gay?).  So, are you saying that people like me shouldn’t be allowed to get married to the people they love?  Are you?  Hmmm...?”

And everyone will just be standing there with their jaws on the floor, all awkward and uncomfortable, and I will relish in that discomfort.  

I’ll keep you posted if or when this happens.

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uqhsarah
I always feel like I should be apologizing for myself

me (via uqhsarah)

Me too, and it is because women have been socialised to apologise for their very existence, for the space they take up, both literally, and figuratively, on this planet, in this society. We have been socialised to see ourselves as things, mere objects for others' pleasure and in others' service. We always feel like we need to apologise for being fully formed human beings, because this patriarchal society needs to keep us brainwashed to ensure it's own survival. You are not a thing. You are a fully formed human being with all the rights and privileges that includes, and you should never apologise for that.

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