Heard from the 118

Chim: Our Buck? You’re into Evan Buckley? Ravi: The drill sergeant from hell? The chainsaw maniac? Chim: The power czar? The clipboard tyrant? Hen: The firehose? The chainsaw wielding menace? Eddie: Yup, all of those. Any thoughts? Hen: And prayers, Eddie. Many, many prayers.

Eddie: I’m definitely the one that is in charge in the relationship.

Buck: Babe, could you stand up?

Eddie: *stands up*

Buck: Thank you, you can sit back down, love.

Eddie: *sits back down*

Buck: Hey, could you look at me?

Eddie: *looks at him while blushing*

Buck: Thank you, baby.

Eddie, still blushing: Anyway. Watch this. Buck, get me a glass of water.

Buck: Say please.

Eddie: Could you please get me a glass of water?

Buck: Of course.

Eddie: *proud of himself* See!

Hen, surprised: Yeah Eddie, you sure are in charge.

*Eddie entering Buck's apartment*

Buck, on the phone: Yeah sure, I can be master tonight. 8 p.m sound ok?

Eddie: What?!

Buck: Good. You better be prepped and ready when I get there.

Eddie, blushing: ...

Buck: Hey, what's up? Did we have plans?

Eddie: No, we didn't but- You're a- Could you be my master, sometime? Maybe?

Buck: Sure man, I didn't know you were into that.

Eddie, still blushing: Me neither, but I can learn if you teach me.

Buck: It'd be an honor taking your virginity.

Buck: Listen, I have a special evening planned for us.

Tommy: Really?

Buck: Yeah, but I'm not gonna give away everything.

Tommy: Maybe a hint?

Buck: It involves wine, an amazing dinner, and a safety word we agree upon in advance.

Tommy, blushing: God, you're gonna make a great dad one day.

Buck: Make sure to stretch and be prepped by 8 pm.

Tommy: Yes, sir.

Eddie: Hen, I need your help.

Hen: Are you ok? What happened?

Eddie: I need to stop being attracted to Buck.

Hen: What happened…?

Eddie: I was about to have a panic attack and Buck, trying to distract me, told me to be gentle with myself.

Hen: That's not too bad.

Eddie: Then he said, "I'm the only one allowed to be rough with you" and then he just left.

Hen: Not gonna lie, that was smooth. I say have fun and always use a safe word.

Eddie: What are you in the mood for?

Buck: World domination.

Eddie: Isn't that a bit ambitious for a Valentine's date?

Buck: Well, you are my world.

Eddie: Aww, you're so cute— wait.

Buck: ...

Eddie: ...

Eddie: Yes! Let's do that!

*Buck holding a clipboard while doing inventory with Eddie*

Buck: Trauma bag? Eddie: Yup. Buck: I'm sorry. What was that? Eddie: Yes… Sir? Buck, smirking: Watch it. We are at work. Eddie: Check... Daddy? Buck: You're so gonna get punished *smacks Eddie's ass with the clipboard* Eddie, smiling: Check.

Eddie: I beg your pardon!

Buck: Then beg.

Eddie: Please *brings out his beautiful brown cow eyes while pouting* sir?

Buck: Bedroom. Now

Eddie, smirking: Yes, sir.

Hen: How did you pick up men before dating Eddie?

Buck: I used to have way too much fun waving guys over at the bar just to say "I only wanted to see if you’d obey" before dismissing them.

Hen: So you just teased them and that was it?

Buck: They only got to meet the firehose if they liked the teasing and stayed at the bar in the hopes I'd change my mind.

Hen, laughing: You are a menace to society.

*Eddie thinking they are roleplaying*

Buck: Hey babe, the team wanted to say hello, you are on speaker though so you better behave.

Eddie: What if I don't wanna behave? Are you gonna spank me? Bring out the spreader bar? Cuff me to the bed again?

The whole 118 and Buck: *complete silence*

Eddie: Hello? Buck, are you still bringing the clipboard? Buck?

Buck: *hangs up*

Buck: Hey babe, you’re on speaker. Behave.

Eddie: Or what, you’ll spank me?

Hen: ...

Chimney: ...

Buck: *hangs up*