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Heard from the 118

@911-incorrect-quotes-dispatch / 911-incorrect-quotes-dispatch.tumblr.com

Incorrectly quoting firefighters from the 118 fire station
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Maddie: I see you're taking the break-up well.

Buck: I've been on this baking kick, any time I get the urge to call Tommy, I channel the impulse into something positive.

Chim: That's very healthy and smells delicious.

Buck: You guys are taking home a lemon loaf, a walnut loaf and a pumpkin loaf.

Maddie: Maybe that's too many loaves-

Buck: So I should call him?

Maddie: No! Just forget the past, think of the future and trust the universe is bringing you a special person...

*Maddie looking at the many photos of Eddie and Chris on the fridge*

Maddie: Maybe the universe already has, and you just haven't noticed them yet.

Chim: Also don't stop baking, keep the loaves coming please.

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Eddie, on a call with Karen: I can’t make it to wine night.

Maddie, in the background: Boo, you whore.

Karen: Eddie, you promised.

Eddie: I know, I know, but Buck fell asleep.

Karen: Then leave him a note and come over.

Eddie, gently brushing Buck’s curls: He fell asleep on my lap and I really don’t want to wake him up.

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Hen: Bobby is gonna kill us, or worse, he's gonna put us on different shifts.

Chim: Do not panic we saved our best idea for last!

Eddie: Wait if it was our best idea, why did we save it for last?

Buck: Because we didn’t know it was our best idea until all our other ideas turned out to be terrible.

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Chim: Eddie, would you rather fight a really buff nerd or a jock who listens to jazz?

Eddie: Guys, a little help here.

Hen: Hmm, the nerd would have a lot of pent-up anger and might pretend you are his dad.

Buck: But because of the jock’s exposure to jazz music, his attack patterns and movements are a lot less predictable. 

Eddie: I guess I'd fight the jock.

Chim: Elaborate.

Eddie: The buff nerd might not know how to fight at all and only got buffed as a deterrent from getting bullied.

Chim: So you choose the one who might put up a fight?

Eddie: Well yes, I'd want the fight to be fair and fun. The jock is at least physically coordinated enough to belong to a team, and adding the fact that they like jazz might make him unpredictable enough in the fight that I could even lose.

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