The Blood Man Cometh

bingo

Kat Rosenfield, What We Sacrifice to be Seen

Gretchen Felker-Martin, What's the Harm in Reading?

Elena Scotti, We Have to Save Books from the Book People

People who treat D&D's classes as like being in any way representative of fiction outside of D&D are my nemesis, I just saw a post that was like "remember the difference between a Sorcerer a Warlock and a Wizard is this" and treating like those words as if their very D&D specific meanings were like universally accepted I'm going to start taking hostages

"remember as we all know a Paladin is like this" Oh I'm sorry I didn't get the memo that Charlemagne's twelve peers could all use divine smite and divine sense and cast divine sense and summon magic horses. You piece of shit. Don't ever talk to me

"the difference between a Druid and a Cleric" You are nothing. Words mean things here in the real world.

The definitions aren't even consistent across different editions of Dungeons & Dragons. The earliest codified use of the term "sorcerer" in D&D had X-Men style mutant powers rather than being a wizard variant. Druids in 2nd Edition were a militant brotherhood who determined their internal rankings by having anime-style tournament arcs. The bard's first core-book appearance was as a high-level prestige class for dual-class fighter/druids. If you wanted to be a wizard with a sword in BD&D you had to be an elf, because the race/class split didn't exist, and "elf" was the hybrid arcane caster class. "Warlock" has meant about four different things. If you're trying to universalise these definitions, you aren't just going to be wrong about fantasy fiction more generally, you're also going to be wrong about most iterations of D&D.

You guys are gonna love my next book, Death Cleric

Fun fact about Tobi: I have a blistering personal hatred for Alex Jones. Mostly because he was my mentally ill, brain damaged mother's (I'm not being cruel she literally has a hole in her brain from cancer) introduction to the world of conspiracy theories and alt right bullshit.

So for years, every now and then, I put a curse on him. Curses are fun because they let you feel like you're hurting someone without ever actually doing anything illegal that could conceivably harm them. My curse was in the form of a drawing- Anubis, the Egyptian god of death and judgment, as a jackal, eating the heart out of Jones' chest.

Today I wake up to the news that Jones' stupid fucking Infowars channel was bought by the Onion, who intends to gut it out and use its corpse as a puppet to mock the ignorance the channel once espoused as truth.

I'm not saying there is or is not a god. But I have a sneaking suspicion there might be an Anubis.

Drew another one to celebrate why not. Suffer and die you stupid motherfucker.

Forgotten Realms is just spamming 2 and 3 over and over and over. Ed Greenwood is great.

I think Greenwood also tends to trip into #4 a lot in the narrow context of BDSM dynamics; there's a strong undercurrent of "everyone is a switch – some people just don't know it yet" in much of his work.

I keep tripping and writing #7, unfortunately.

This was so peak in 1999

I regret to inform you that it’s absolutely still peak in 2024

Loads faster, too.

Some pissed off Byzantine alchemist: "Alright dude, you know what the fuck you're acting like right now?"

HERE, HAVE A PAINTED WOOLY BAT

THIS BAT WOKE UP AND CHOSE HALLOWEEN!!!

crazy that these aren’t photoshopped. fuckers are just like that. that is their GENUINE SWAGGER

The paradox of tolerance is only a paradox if you think of tolerance as some sacred and unconditional moral duty. Some ultimate and absolute law with no exceptions, and if you ever slip into the sin of intolerance, you must repent yourself and beg for forgiveness. Yeah no fuck that. Tolerance is a social contract. You're in the game as an equal player for as long as you play by the same rules as everyone else, and if you don't, your ass is fucking out. You're not entitled to the same respect you won't give others.

"Oh so you all tolerate each other just because you tolerate each other, but if I want to destroy you, then all of a sudden you want to destroy me?" Literally yes. That's the gist of it. What's not clicking. This equation is so simple it barely counts as math.

"I refuse to sign the social contract if it means I have to be polite to people I don't understand" said the bigot

"Well then you aren't protected by the terms and conditions" says everyone who has signed

There is no queer art you can create that will ever be acceptable enough for the Christian far right, so why bother trying? Make art they'd hate.

Relevant here, I think. Please go weird and go hard!!

The angel came to me in a fever hallucination, perched upon my bed as I returned from the bathroom.

My next book, Sacrament, is a very dark and indulgent M/M/M vampire dark romance that will be released early next year.

Check here for more information and content warnings.

If you want an ARC (advance review copy), apply here.

Pre-orders. There's a discount until the release date in 2025.

Add to Goodreads.

as much as I love portrayals of the sun and moon as a (lesbian) couple, the greeks were really on to something when they said "actually they're siblings who disapprove of each other's life choices"

nosferatu pin

@cadaverousdecay

JESUS?? 

JESUS????

i had no idea they were so frickin huge

I love them so much because they’re about as sharp as a baseball and their anatomy is ridiculous to the point of them literally being classified as plankton for years because they just sort of get blown around by the ocean and look confused, but because they lay more eggs than ANY OTHER VERTEBRATE IN EXISTENCE, evolution can’t stop them

Why is no big predator coming and gnawing on them?

Their biggest defense is that they’re massive and have super tough skin, but they do get hunted by sharks or sea lions sometimes and they just sort of float there like ‘oh bother’ as it happens

Even funnier, because they eat nothing but jellyfish they’re really low in nutritional value anyway, so they basically survive by being not worth eating because they’re like a big floating rice cracker wrapped in leather.

So basically the only reason natural selection hasn’t taken care if them is because they are the most useless fish

yes, they’ve perfected uselessness to the point of being unstoppable

a true inspiration

Evolution didn’t care about fittest or best, it cares about the CARE MINIMUM.

Which is a being a giant leather rice cake.

AUTO REBLOG OF PACIFIC SUNFISH. MOTHER NATURE AT HER MOST WHIMSICAL. THE FARTHEST YOU GET FROM FISH DESIGN AND STILL CALL IT A FISH. AKA FLOATING CARDBOARD IN FISH FORM.

They aren’t useless, you monsters! The fact that they eat so many jellyfish is their exact ecological purpose. They are a key part of controlling jellyfish blooms. Sunfish keep jellyfish from taking up all the available space

All hail these jellyfish vacuums who make sure the other delicate creatures of the deep are not accidentally murdered by the jellyfish

Sea Roomba, you say?

After being in Japan for one of the Jellyfish blooms these giant floating rice cakes might be in my top three favorite fish now since they eat the damn things.

just so you understand how important it is for things to eat jellyfish, this is what jellyfish “blooms” look like

if anything we wish sunfish were twice as big. We used to think almost nothing eats jellyfish, but thank goodness we’re finding several other creatures snack on them, but very few specialize in them as much as sunfish do